Contentedly Neurotic

Senior Year Sticker Shock

2011-11-17T10:47:00.001-08:00

My emotions this year are worse than a run-away roller coaster. I have a Senior. One moment, I'm smiling with pride at what a fine young man he's become...er, becoming (he's still a teen, so even though he does grown up things, he still reverts and does bone-headed teen things, too). The next moment I'm in tears, my baby has grown up, his school years will be over soon. A few moments later I'm ticked.

Yes, I get frustrated, at times, with the teen behavior. However, my main frustrations are from Sticker Shock.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not completely naive. I knew this would be an expensive year. I just didn't realize how many petty fees were involved.It's the petty fees that have me in a tizzy.

In October, my son brought home the graduation order packet. I cried, however my eyes quickly dried once I read the packet. My first rude awakening: We have to buy the cap and gown. I don't understand the point. I'm a bargain shopper. I look for the best deal I can find. The cap and gown cost twice what my last pair of pants cost. And, I'm getting more than a few hours of usage from my pants. A few people from other schools have told me the gowns they have are papery. I really hope I'm not paying that much for paper. If the schools had seniors pay $10 up front for storage fees, the gowns could be kept at the school and there would be plenty to cover cleaning and storage.

The other petty fee? Graduation announcements. I understand the cost of foil embossed cards announcing my child's success. However, I would be more receptive and spend more if the company didn't make petty moves to increase their sales. You get 30 announcement cards. If you would like the parchment inserts for a more classic look, you can buy them, but they come in a quantity of 25. So if I only need 30 cards, I have to buy 50 inserts, 20 of which will be used for baking cookies, I guess. Is it really too much to ask for items that go together to be sold in the same quantity? Even the hot dog people got it together with the bun people.

The last shock (I hope it's the last) which saddened me to no end, $50 to put a baby picture in the yearbook. I looked forward to the day I'd get to pick a baby picture of my son for the yearbook. I think most of us do. We put in a lot of work raising our children, we get a lot of heartache, too. But, in the end, we want to see that difference. We want to open that yearbook and see them way back when and what they've become. We want others to see that difference, as well.

The yearbook staff lays out the baby pictures 2 to 4 per page, averaging about 6 per page, front and back combined. I don't believe it costs $300 to produce one page. So why the high fee, are the kids trying to keep mom and dad from getting a picture in?

I'm proud of my child, my tears ebb and flow, or flow and ebb. My frustration is high and it comes and gos. I will try to justify some of the fees (still coughing over senior pictures), but in the end, I have to stay true to my checking and say no to some petty fees. After all, I want my frustrations to be because of low-brain-cell teen moments. Greedy companies will be always be around, but my son's final years of teen hood will be over soon. Pardon me, I need to get some tissue.

Grateful~Grateful~Grateful

2011-10-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

Five Gratefuls:

1) I'm thankful that some people don't hop on Negative Nelly's Bandwagon. I have a relative who is not appreciative of my writing. I was chosen to be a guest columnist for a local paper this year. It's a non-paying gig, but it's great for clips and shows I can consistently meet deadlines.

Anyway, another relative mentioned she's been reading my columns and enjoying them. Neg. Nelly throws out "Do you get any compensation for those?" Which is a legitimate question, except she's asked that a few times now...only in front of other people. But, the other relative didn't bite. She was still happy.

2) I'm grateful for people who write to columnists when a column touches them. What a great feeling opening my emails and seeing those comments.

3) I'm grateful for my kids. I have learned more in life because I have been blessed with these boys.

4) I'm grateful for my husband. He is supportive of my choices in life. There are times he has no clue why something may mean so much to me, but he never says "no."

5) I'm grateful for delete buttons. Seriously, life is so much easier when I'm not erasing holes in papers.

What are you grateful for today?

Ollie Bear

2011-10-10T11:54:00.000-07:00

See that cute, cuddly kitten? That's Ollie.
Also Know As:
Ollie Bear - because he's kind of big and round
Shred - because when he's trapped inside, that's his favorite way to relieve aggression
Steam Shovel - because, I kid you not, he eats like a steam shovel. He puts his head down, opens his mouth and scoops his jaw across the bowl.

He came as set, that's Stan...the one on his belly.

Ollie used to be the mild, tentative one. He used to let Stan (yes, they are named after Laurel and Hardy - because I love Stan Laurel) venture out and try new things. They started in a safe corner near our couch so we could protect them from our other two cats. Stan, ventured to the kitchen first, upstairs, first, garage first, and outside first. Ollie hung back and watched Stan.

One day, Ollie stopped hanging back. This past spring he took to the outside. Our $20 dollar kitten...uh, I guess $10, became a good chuck of change kitten. He prowled the neighborhood (yes, he had all his shots) but he still got a virus/infection/something. He had a temp and spent a few nights at the vet. The only animal with a stream of visitors. The vet was happy to send Ollie home.

Ollie has had a few vet visits along with his typical shots and that whole fixing thing, that really ticked him off. But, I think the vet has been cheaper than the food bill.

That's Ollie's "Who's in my food bowl?" look.

I love that bear. He has the tiniest meow it's short and soft, "ow". He's fun to snuggle, when he comes in he searches for me to rub his head, and there's nothing warmer than waking up in the middle of the night to him sprawled across my feet.

Friday - Whew!

2011-09-30T09:55:00.000-07:00

Ah, the lazy days of summer. The photo is of Twin A and Twin B. We discovered overcast days are the best for local swim spots. We had the place to ourselves for most of the day.

This picture just gave me a sense of calm after looking over teen son's schedule for the next few days. Holy schnikes! He's up at 5:45 (wants to pick up his girlfriend, so he sacrifices an extra 20 minutes of sleep). Since it's Homecoming week, today after school the band will get dressed up and play in the Homecoming parade, attend the carnival, and then go straight to the football game. He should be home close to 11p.m. I'm tired just thinking about his day. He'll probably stay up until 1:00 a.m.

Tomorrow he'll be up early washing the truck for the dance that evening. He'll be picking up the corsage (that mom so kindly thought to order in advance...mom's of boys, plan ahead, they just assume florists are on-call 24/7 and can whip up a corsage in 5 minutes) and his girlfriend. Doing pictures and dinner and then he'll be out until about 12:30. The dance goes until midnight.

And you know what? He'll still be a ball of energy when he gets home. Oh, to be 17 again....but without all the high school angst....and zits...and he said/ she saids...

Have a wonderful weekend everyone!

Grateful Wednesday

2011-09-28T06:00:00.000-07:00

First, my apologies for all the typos in my last post.

~ Grateful Five ~

1. Sore muscles. Yep, that's just warped, but it reminds me that I worked hard.

2.I'm grateful I have a child who really wants to know his grades. Of course, he insists he hates school and it's cruel and unusual punishment that he has to attend. But, when I went in to sort homework papers yesterday, Twin A had written on his paper the numbers 1, 2, 3, 4. Written both above and below with arrows pointing from all angles to the numbers, he wrote: "Please circle my score." I've never seen a child more excited about a grade.

Either he's super proud of the work he did or he's hoping the teacher will be so impressed and just give him a 4 without looking.

3. Teen son is quite the gentleman. He carries his girlfriend's books. He opens the door for her. He even gets up earlier than necessary so he can drive 3 miles out of his way to pick her up for school.

Now, if only he would carry a few bags of groceries without my having to ask. On the plus side, he does open the door for me.

4. Volunteering at the school. This is the twins' last year of elementary school, when the year is over it will end 15 years of dropping off, picking up, volunteering at that school. Teen started the preschool program in the school back in 1997. And teen is graduating this year. Oh my, Kleenex moment.

5. I'm grateful for fall. I love the cooler weather and the leaves falling. My husband hates fall. Only because it never fails the day he goes out and blows the leaves away, we get a big wind storm that brings them all right back. Every. Single. Year. I know when he goes out, the next day or evening we will lose power, whether that be for a few minutes or days, it will happen.

Maybe I should start placing bets with people?

What makes you grateful?

WIP Help - Mine or Cellar?

2011-09-26T06:00:00.000-07:00

It's amazing how one small item can flick the proverbial switch. In this case it was flicked on.

See, I've been trying to find a suitable hiding spot for a dead couple in my WIP. I've gone through many thoughts a long-forgotten bomb shelter. Blech, doesn't fit with the Montana image I have.

An old ice house? No. A hidden cellar entrance...this was much more plausible and I may revert back to it. In the house I grew up the cellar was under the hallway floor. It was a dirt cellar and it scared the bejeebus out of me when my mom would ask my sister and I to go get a canned item. Thankfully, her canning didn't last long. Either she got tired of my sister and I bickering or we didn't eat it quick enough.

The bickering ensued when we were asked to get a jar from the cellar. The floor-door was a carved out U-shape approximately 6 feet long and 3 feet wide (it reminded me of a hole dug for a casket), most people never knew it existed. There was a small ring used to pull the floor-door open. This was the first hurdle. As the tiny ring was tiny (enough space for three fingers) and the floor-door heavy, it hurt. That was the first bickering point - who would lift the door. I don't know why we bickered, as the other person didn't have a great job either. The person not lifting the door, had to grab the bar from the laundry and shimmy along a two inch wide section of floor and position the bar to hold the floor-door up.

Then the really spat began. Who would go get the jar? These were knock-down, drag-out battles. Neither of us trusted the other. We each assumed the other would shut the floor-door. The fear was intense. There was only a single light-bulb connected to an old rope-like electrical wire (picture the basement scene in Psycho). Except the Psycho basement seemed better because it was walled-in. The dirt walls did nothing but suck up the light. The shelf was about 5 yards in to the right. The wooden steps were okay, wide at least, but the section to the left and under the stairs was pitch dark. There was always a fear of a hand reaching up and grabbing my ankles. Actually, it wasn't an ordinary hand, it was a pale, coal-smudged hand. The bones thick and knotty with long fungus-encrusted nails just as thick.

Whoever lost the battle would sprint the two strides, grab blindly and blaze back up the stairs. If mom got peaches instead of pears, oh well. Her wrath was much warmer than going back in the cellar.

See why the cellar seems like a logical choice? However, as my husband was lighting the brickets for the BBQ, it dawned on me, an abandoned mine might be a good choice. Growing up in Montana the adults were always yelling at us to watch for mine shafts. There are many small holes left open with no warning signs or fences. The big abandoned mines are all obvious and protected. I even lucked out and fell down one that branched off. It was about 10 feet down and the split between the right and left tunnels was where I landed.

So the coal triggered mine and now I'm debating cellar or abandoned Manganese or Silver mine?

What would creep you out more?

Tidbits

2011-09-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

Tidbit 1:
It wasn't so long ago my twins were influenced by one of the teen's friends. The teen friend is concerned about Zombies, a Zombie apocolypse to be exact (yes, I've already told the young lad to lay off the horror movies and freaky video games).

This friend is well read on how to protect himself in the event Zombies attack. My twins wanted to stop at Walmart and pick up a flame-thrower.

A few nights ago, dear twins were watching television and apparently they saw a jet pack. They want one. I wonder if Walmart would carry those in the same aisle as the flame throwers?

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Tidbit 2:
Don't snub tiny local writing events. I attended a small writing event in the next tiny town over. I'm proud to say the energy can be just as exhilarating and I walked away with ideas galore.

Scout out these small affairs as the fees are reasonable ($10 with lunch included - oh yeah). Oh, make sure you block out the rest of your day for writing. Once the event is over you will be ready to fire off pages of ideas.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Let's Get Grateful Again

2011-09-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

I will never stop these Grateful Posts...well, when I'm blogging regularly. They may not be every week, but I always come back to them because they keep positive.

Five Gratefuls:
1. SCHOOL IS IN SESSION! Wheeeheehee! I love my kids, I do, but it's amazing how much more I accomplish when they are in school. My brain cells regenerate and I'm sort of sane for 8 months. Which is really important after this summer. Twin B, was all over the "What ifs..." as in, "What if Aliens did live here and we didn't know it?" Uh, then things would be the same because we didn't know any better? "What if we were born knowing everything and you didn't know it and were still making us go to school to learn stuff we already know that you don't know?" Yep, that one had my "Do you hear the crickets over my head?" look.

2. I can still multi-task like a pro. Today, I was cooking, critiquing over the phone, and directing children with hand signals (nice ones...with the exception of the knock it off signal - handing swooshing across neck). I didn't stir a pen into dinner, or signal my children to cut "try to attempt to", or yell at the gal whose piece I was critiquing to stop the toot noises.

3. Driving. I love to drive, especially along rural, tree lined roads. This always makes me smile.

4. I'm grateful my son didn't end his "Mom, I gotta talk to you about something," with "my girlfriend is pregnant." He was so serious, I was sure something seriously life-altering was coming. Instead, he showed me a parking ticket. The first time I've ever been happy my son received a ticket.

5. I'm grateful that the twins are back in the same classroom again this year. Their teacher is the best. This man has had darling teen (see above) and the twins. He really teaches kids independence and responsibility. He also has a great way with children and can get kids interested in almost anything. However, I'm sure he's redone his teacher contract to include, "If that Johnson woman has any more kids, my salary triples."

What makes you grateful?

A Long Break, But I'm Still Kickin'

2011-09-19T06:00:00.000-07:00

In case anyone is still around, I didn't forget about Blogland. I know it seems that way, but life presented me with some wonderful opportunities and I jumped.

Since I last posted:

My husband has signed on with a new company and they've been quite busy.
I participated in a 5 Mile Fun Run (finished 5th to last, but I did it)
I participated in a 5K and met the goal I set for myself for next year - I finished in the middle of the pack.
Running has become something I look forward to doing.
I took a part-time job. I'm in shock at the opportunity that has come my way. I can choose the days and hours I work, allowing me time to run, volunteer at my children's school, and write.

It took me a bit to get the running and part-time job evenly worked into my schedule. I've never been one of those people who can take on new commitments without a glitch. Hence the huge gap in posts.

I'm sure I've missed many wonderful events and some events that could have used some extra prayers as well. Even though I was out of Blogland, I still sent thoughts out there for all those who were experiencing some of life's down-slopes on the roller coaster. A coaster that must have leveled out and started climbing again. I can't wait to check in and see.

Have a splendid day!

And There Was Sun...and Police

2011-06-27T06:00:00.000-07:00

We finally get a sunny day and the cats take the best seat outside.

We are thrilled to have had two days of sun and temps in the low- to mid- seventies. I think summer is actually going to make an appearance.

I'm going to give you a mini-glimpse of how odd moments always happen in my life. I do not have normal moments...ever.

I had a physical a few days before the sun made an appearance. Apparently, my veins don't plump up for needles as well as my stomach does at the sight of donuts. Four bazillion tries later, I was left with poke marks and budding bruises on both arms. Yes Mom, this is why I still hate going to the doctor.

Next day, sun is out, it's warm...er warmish, and I have to run to the bank and cash a money order. I have a t-shirt on. I hand the teller the money order and she glances at my beautiful blue and purple arms. Then she says she can't cash the money order because it isn't signed. Great, thanks RC! As I turn to leave I see her pointing at me (through the reflection of their Plexiglas display thingy) to another gal.

Later that evening, I take the twins on a walk around the lake. We stop at the lake and skip rocks, my loving boys tell me how inept I am with rock skipping. I threaten the little devils and we head to the park...which is less than a block from my house. The boys get on the swings and no sooner does Twin A miss-time his leap and biff it, two police cars speed over from separate directions (which is a big deal because the road is one-way) and the officers hop out. TwinA thinks he's in trouble for leaping from the swing and will never, ever, attempt that stunt again...judging by the look on his face, anyway.

As the officers approach and ask if I made a call about unruly kids, I notice their eyes aren't looking at my face...yep, I still had my t-shirt on.

I would like to say I was all casual about it, but I had a mini-war in my brain over whether or not to say anything. On the one hand, I could clear this up, but on the other they might have perceived my forthcoming information as excuses. So I did the next best thing and stood there with my deer-in-the-headlights look.

I'm sure they understood, right? And the bank will forget who I am by my next visit right?

Choices, Choices, Choices

2011-06-22T11:15:00.000-07:00

(There would be a picture here, but Blogger is giving me grief with the pic posting - yes, it could be user error, but I'm all for blaming Blogger, because I can.)

I am trying to give my MC a job. She has moved to a small town. By small, I'm talking approximately two blocks of businesses. It's similar to the town I grew up in Montana.

Here's the thing about small town businesses, they don't last. Correction; unless it's the only grocery, a church or a bar, it won't last. Us small towners have priorities, you know.

Which leaves me wondering what job my MC can do. I want her next to the bar, but I don't want her working there. I was thinking an antique shop, but well, it's been done a few hundred times and the local one in my hometown has changed ownership oh...a few dozen times. I guess it will have to be the drugstore...but I could have her working at another storefront, this won't be a series so I shouldn't worry about the longevity of the business, right?

How do you pick your character's job? If I hadn't grown up in a small town, I may have had my MC working at a coffee shop. Out in Western Washington that isn't so far fetched. But for a tiny town in Montana, it's not the norm. People gather for plain coffee at the local cafe.

Just thought I'd share my thought process. I would love to hear other ideas on what you look for to fit your character and the setting when picking jobs.

Five Ways to Tick off Your Readers

2011-06-15T10:25:00.000-07:00

I love slapstick and mystery. Mix the two in a book and I'm thrilled. I love the bumbling Stephanie Plum series by Janet Evanovich. She knows how to create colorful characters.

I've been on a search for more inept protagonists hunting down a good mystery. In this quest, I've discovered a few (ahem...quite a few) books that have left me putting the book down a few chapters in.

Today: The Top Five Ways to Tick Off Your Readers

1) Use atrocious writing: Readers hate regular words, so making up your own will confuse them. Double the irritation if the words are made up adverbs like, warningly, puzzedly, and wonderingly. Make one paragraph spam two pages. Even better, make two sentences for those paragraphs. Nothing irks a reader more than a 137-word sentence (yes, counting the words of that sentence was more fun than reading the story).

2) Throw in major plot holes: Have your protagonist hop in a car and speed off to freedom. Switch point-of-view, then, when returning to protagonist, have her flag down a vehicle to whisk her away to freedom.

3) Repeat major points for your reader. Readers hate thinking they are dumb. If you repeat four times why Mr. Macho is so suspicious it ruins the surprise when, at the end of the story, it turns out Mr. Macho is the killer.

4) Throw in your political views. Readers want to escape in a good book. They deal with the everyday crud going on around them and in an election season they are tired of hearing which party knows best. So, what better way to tick off your reader than to preach your political views through your characters?

5) In the height of action, bog the reader down. Readers despise descriptive scenes, flashbacks, and repetitive phrases telling them how injured the protagonist is during, what could be, a heart-racing, page-turning action scene.

Did I miss anything? What is the final straw for you when you read?

NOTE: When I finish my book, please refer me back to this post and slap me upside the head with my manuscript.

Conversations with My Children

2011-06-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

Just a few conversations I've had with my children (and another kid) this weekend.

Twin B's class earned a fun night. His teacher was also my oldest son's teacher (although he only taught 5th grade then...this year he teaches a mixed 4th/5th class). He is the only teacher I know who does this event and kids and adults all enjoy it. They get the school from 5:30 to 10:30 at night. They have access to their classroom, all the hallways, and the gym.

This Friday they even went outside. Some games they've played: Dodge ball (and the adults have no mercy...then again, neither do the children), video games (the teacher sets up the TV in the classroom), Sardines (all the lights are off except in the classroom. One person leaves and hides in a darkened hallway. After a few minutes, all the other kids and adults head out. It is super quiet. When a person finds the kid who left to hide, they join the person in the hiding spot. Usually, the pack of sardines gives themselves away by giggling at the last person trying to find the group).

This Friday was Capture the Flag. I've never played this game. When I showed up to pick up my child he grabbed me and told me to get in the game. When I told him I had no idea how to play, he threw his hands up in the air, then yelled the directions at me.

"I love you, too son." I said sarcastically.

"Then you better not lose the ball," he replied.

As I guarded the ball (which was the flag), one child told me to go tag our players who were in prison. I headed across the field only to have a young girl grab my arm and march me back to the ball.

"Mrs. J, guard the ball. Do not leave."

"But, Boy said..."

"Mrs. J, stay!" And yes, she pointed and gave the stern look with the comment.

********************************************************************************

At dinner:

Twin A: No guy, the Zombies have to eat Lego man.

Twin B: K, but then he's going to be a zombie and they'll attack Justin Beiber and kill him.

Me: Guys, can we have one day without any death, violence, or destruction?
Twin B: That would be boring.

********************************************************************************

Teen: Mom, I know. I'm working on History class assignment.

Me: Son, you can't work on it while talking on your cell phone and blasting music.

Teen: I do better that way.

Me: Son, your grade is on the line here.

Teen: Mom, you're totally stressing me out. (Into his phone: Duuude, my mom is totally stressing, I gotta go).

Life is never boring...ever.

At Least He's Paying Attention

2011-06-10T06:00:00.000-07:00

Twin B's class was going on a field trip. It wasn't a normal, load the buses, drive to location, unload, look around, load buses and arrive back at school type field trip.

The kids didn't even see the school at all that day. They needed to be at the commuter train station, where they rode into Seattle, walked five city blocks, boarded a marine boat, and tooled out to the middle of Puget Sound, then reversed the process to come home.

Twin B is a bit of a dilly-dallier when walking. I was nervous about him separating from his group on the five block walk.

The teachers were worried about 4th and 5th graders shoving one another in front of the commuter train.

Between all my warnings and the teacher's warnings I think my son got the hint. I found his field trip notes in his folder:

Time for a Few Gratefuls

2011-06-08T06:00:00.000-07:00

It's been awhile since I've been thankful. I can't go too long without being thankful or I turn into a grouch, so to appease my grouchiness, here are few things for which I'm grateful:

1. I'm thankful my husband is working more laid off than when he was an employee. Yes, I know that is back*bleep*backwards, but that is the way we roll.

2. I'm thankful my cat, Ollie, is healthy. He's only two and he had a viral infection with temps of 105.5. He was the only pet in the vet hospital with a stream of visitors during his stay. The vet was thrilled when he was well enough to go home...so were we.

3. I'm thankful the above mentioned cat is my loveable bear. Otherwise, I may have sent him back to the vet after the umpteenth slash-fest while throwing meds down his throat. We only five more days left...type A+ blood donations welcome.

4. I'm thankful my teen texted me with "Love you to (sic)". I will never delete that text. Ever.

5. I'm thankful for sun. We've been having a bleak spring. Don't get me wrong, I love the cooler temps, but having some sun definitely makes life brighter.

WHAT ARE YOU THANKFUL FOR TODAY?

Retweaking the Blog

2011-06-06T06:00:00.000-07:00

I've been a blogging hiatus...well a sporadic hiatus. It started when I ran out of time searching for Friday Quotes. Then progressed throughout my weekly posts. I let that bother me to no end.

The number one rule of writing is to not stop. I broke the cardinal rule. After much head banging, I gave myself the lecture I rightly deserved and am just omitting Friday Quotes. Well, maybe I won't omit them all together, but I'm not going to search them out anymore. If I hear a good one, I'll post it. Otherwise it will be a Friday Free-For-All.

I know I said I was back on the wagon a few...fine more than a few weeks ago. This time, I'm sitting tight. I've sent grabbed the reigns and I've pre-scheduled all my posts for this week. YEEHAW!

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go visit your blogs. I've been sorely missing all the funny and insightful posts.

Happy Monday!

iPad Apps

2011-05-23T12:39:00.000-07:00

A few of my favorite Apps:

Zite is a news site that gives you what you want to read. Each time you select whether you like an item or not it remembers and keeps giving you more items you like.

Plants vs. Zombies: I'm addicted. So are my children. We lie on the floor around the iPad and play together. Who knew you could have family time on the iPad?

AppShopper: I can search for all new free apps. Which is great because I'm a freebie junkie. It's sad, I know.

Google Earth: I just discovered a house on the block that has a pool, like a real swimming pool type of pool. I'm so jealous. Yes, I'm spying on my neighbor's. I also made the mistake of telling my husband our back lawn was greener than everyone else's. His ego soared. In all honesty it's hard to tell if it's green because of grass or moss. It's Western Washington...we're always water-logged.

neu.Notes: It's a great note application and it lets me choose the color of ink I want. I'm like googly-eyed over this app.

Pages: Although, I confess it's taking me a while to learn all it can do, but I'm happy to have an app to write with.

I still need to learn how to use the Cloud. I like being able to access documents from my home computer, but for whatever reason, my brain is just not wrapping it's cells around the cloud concept yet. If you know how to use the cloud or know where to locate a lesson plan please, enlighten me.

iPad 2 Basics...Very Basic Beginning

2011-05-16T06:00:00.000-07:00

I received a comment during from Perri wondering how the iPad is working for me. Um, I hope you're okay with me sharing your name Perri, sorry. It was an excellent comment.

I usually do research before buying anything over $50. I did a bit of research (er, um, scouring the app store) before buying the iPad.

Anyway, I figured for Apple product novices, like myself, a few posts might come in handy. Please note: NOVICE. Meaning, I may not be able to shed the best light and may be of no help. In other words, these would be great ideas for questions to ask the sales people.

Let's start with the very basic. You need to download iTunes. Once it's on your computer, it's pretty easy to wander around and find things. I do love when I connect the iPad everything just syncs. I don't have to babysit. With the exception of when there is a new software update for the iPad. That took a bit of finagling to figure out.

When you plug in, your computer pops up iTunes and the computer screen tells you it's syncing (at the very top of the iTunes page). When there is a software update it wants you sync everything before updating. I've done two things, here. The first time, I declined to download and update at that time, then synced everything. Because I didn't know what I was doing, I unplugged the connection closed out iTunes, and then replugged and when iTunes opened, downloaded and installed the update.

The other time, I clicked to download the update only. The iPad downloaded the update and then synced everything. Leaving the iPad plugged in, I went to my account, signed in, and low and behold after reading everything, I found the spot to update. Much easier.

Yes, this is very basic and not answering Perri's comment. Perri you gave me the idea to start posting a bit on the iPad. I will get your comment answered in a future post, but for now, the more I learn, the more it's working for me. At first, I was a bit overwhelmed with all the free apps and spiffy games...ahem..Plants vs. Zombies (not free, but we all enjoy it), that I didn't know how to make it work for me.

Now I'm learning and I've decided losing my iPad would be akin to losing half my brain. I never had a smartphone, so this is really amazing to me. For those who have a smartphone, you're probably rolling your eyes at my excitement. I have everything in that iPad: Contacts, to-dos, notes, everything. Now I just need to learn the Cloud.

For the next few Mondays, I will be posting on basic iPad 2 stuff, like apps and the few things I'm still stuck on.

If you have an iPad or SmartPhone, what is the one feature or app, that you couldn't do without?

And The Winner Is......

2011-05-02T08:41:00.000-07:00

...Countess Laurie!

WhooHoo!

Have a wonderful day!

Diane's World...Party Time + My First Contest

2011-04-27T09:52:00.000-07:00

(My apologies to Mike Myers and Dana Carvey for copying the Wayne's World intro)

I'm positively giddy!

I have news! I met a goal I set when I talked about determination.

Wait for it.....

Wait....

Wait just a little more...

Okay maybe a smidge more....

I got it! I got it! I got it! I got my iPad...the second version. Yes, I totally squealed when I first laid hands on it...I don't recommend doing that in public, you get a lot of odd looks.

Why is this exciting for you? It's proof that if you are determined in your writing, you can accomplish almost any goal. Even if you have to entice yourself over the little hurdles of fear threatening to trip you up along your way.

Let's get on with the contest! (Have I used enough exclamation points?)

I'm having a drawing for a $20 Starbucks card (if I hit 200 followers, I'll up it to $25) on May 1st.

All I ask is that you are a follower and you leave a comment (I have to know who to enter, right?). You can comment with a little "hi," a goal you've set, a goal you've achieved, or a method you used to overcome an obstacle in your path.

Yes, Please

2011-04-25T14:38:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while, when I'm logging in to my email, I get a prompt, followed by two options:

"Would you like to view information that has been delivered securely?"

Option 1: Yes, I would love to keep my email secure from hackers and not worry about which family or friend is getting a virus delivered from me.

OR

Option 2: No, Please unsecure my email and enroll me in the "I want to be hacked" list.

Why do they ask me this? Why do they only ask randomly without giving me one of those option boxes that you click to "Always remember this option,"? And what happens on the days when they don't give me the option?

And, I'm a week late, but Wednesday I'm posting my big news and contest!

Monday, Monday, So Good To Me

2011-04-18T12:33:00.000-07:00

Okay, so today's nothing spectacular, but I feel good. Just one of those days you feel ready to tackle anything. When I'm done with this post, I'm tackling my reading article. It's been giving me grief for far too long. Today, I will...well, fix it, I guess.

I'm also happy that I've completed my first week of training for running a 5k. YAY, I haven't died! Maybe that has something to do with my mood...or maybe that combined with the sun we've had for two days. Whatever it is, I'm liking it.

I'm off to write, what are you doing today?

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ Seasonal writing

2011-04-13T15:29:00.000-07:00

Spring is coming...so I've been told. My mind dances with the idea of sun for whole days at a time. Western Washington hasn't received that spring memo from Mother Nature yet, we're still in the "April showers bring May flowers" gloomy weather mode. Yes, I know "It's still April," but at this rate all the flowers are going to get washed away before blooming.

I want to know: How does the changing of the seasons affect your writing?

For my fiction writing, I notice my characters are more optimistic in the spring and summer months. In fall they are contemplative and in winter they get down surly sometimes. Unless, the weather is frigid, then they become all perky, happy and can take on the world.

For my non-fiction writing, I notice my writings help me with my pitching. In spring, my mind wanders off to the fall. In the stifling heat of summer I'm more than happy to be thinking about winter activities. The seasons keep me on target.

Do the seasons help or hinder you in your writing? Do find a new-found idea coming out of a thaw in the spring? Do your characters lighten up and get a little humorous?

I Will...

2011-04-11T14:33:00.000-07:00

...run a 5K.

That may not seem like much to most people, but for me, oh my. Don't get me wrong, I can walk 3.1 miles easily enough, but run? (Shudder).

I have no aspirations to run a marathon, heck I don't even want to walk a half marathon. Thirteen miles, walking? I get antsy not having pad and pen nearby for 30 minutes, so I'm sure I'd be near a breakdown if I walked nearly four hours (as slow as I am it could possibly take longer) without pen and pad or book in hand.

I do want to try running though. And, I really want to run with my sister. She is amazing. She has run marathons and is doing a triathlon this summer. I love her spirit. I'm sure I'll appreciate the health benefits, too. But for now, I just want to run with my sister.

I started "training" today. I walked the hilly mile around the lake by my house. I even did three mini-runs...um, maybe I should call them micro-runs as they were only about 30 seconds each. Funny how chasing children all these years didn't prepare me for running. Baffling.

I know, not an exciting post, but I'm hoping you will all keep me on track. I signed up for my first 5K at the end of July. Then I want to run a 10K and THEN, I think I'll be ready to run alongside my sister.

What do you want to do with a family member?

First Speaking Engagement

2011-03-30T10:40:00.000-07:00

As a writer (I just called myself a writer without making an apology, yay!), I understand we need to market ourselves. Taking a speaking engagement is a wonderful way to get my name out there. I have just accepted my first speaking arrangement.

I am not a great public speaker. My speech teacher kicked me out. Well, not literally. There was hope I would get better, but I got worse. She went to the principal and helped moved me to another class. Apparently, it wasn't just painful for me, it was painful for everyone having to listen and watch, too.

How does one prepare to speak? What questions will be asked? Will I be able to answer those questions coherently? What if the audience thinks I'm a hack? There is so much pressure.

I'm making a list of key points to cover, bringing a few samples of columns and articles I've published, and talking out loud when my family isn't home.

It's not just my reputation at stake, it's Twin B's as well. I'm speaking in his fourth/fifth grade class (it's a mixed classroom) next week.

As for the marketing, well, maybe one of these kids will start a magazine and I will either get my foot in the door or lose a toe when she remembers the jittery, stuttering, woman that stood in front of her class.

Climbing Back on the Wagon and An Overdue Thank You

2011-03-28T11:59:00.000-07:00

Birthday Flowers

I fell off my Regular Blog Posting wagon. Sorry, I'm a bit clutzy. Thankfully, my wagon passed by today and I was able to grab the side and am currently hanging on for dear life...okay, maybe not dear life, but definitely for my blogging life.

I will post a mega happy event April 20th. I know it seems like forever and a day away, but I'm super thrilled and couldn't wait to let a little tease out of the bag. Since I have been writing a book, I will say it's not nearly as cool as getting an agent or being published. So that's not it. But it's cool enough I will have a contest...EEP, my first contest ever! Contest ideas welcome.

Last week, Lisa over at The Porch Swing Chronicles passed on the Stylish Blogger Award to me. I've been a bit ungrateful and haven't properly thanked her. THANK YOU, LISA! You're very kind and I can't wait to check out the other blogs you've chosen.

Now, if you'll pardon me, I've got to get my rear in the seat of this wagon and get some control. Sheesh, why don't wagons come with five-point harnesses?

Have a wonderful day!

Seriously?

2011-03-21T10:30:00.000-07:00

Maybe I'm one of the few people who refuses to give up the land line phone. Although, I'm sure there are many people who have more than one cell in their home (those other family members or roommates that live there are sure to be prepared if there isn't a land line).

Back on track: I'm reading a back issue of Real Simple Magazine (my mother-in-law is my supplier, when we visit, she sends me home loaded with a month's worth of reading material) and listed in their "Have you heard about...?" section is the most inane website ever.

ICantFindMyPhone.com: Seems like a helpful site right? But here's the deal, if you can't locate your phone you can go to this website and enter your phone's number and it will call your phone. Wouldn't it be easier to just dial your phone from another phone? Seriously, doesn't it take more time to boot up the computer, locate the website, and enter your digits?

Then there's the glaring ironic-ness that Real Simple is touting this website. I figured "Real Simple" was about keeping things simple.

I'm just a bit baffled. Anyone else come across a website that left you baffled (website, not my blog, I baffle myself sometimes, too)?

Just Sayin'

2011-03-16T12:06:00.000-07:00

My kids swear my broom playing is a sign that I am a witch. (Yes, this is the high-point of the 80's hair, although we amped up the volume for an air-drum, air-guitar, and lip-syncing performance of a Dokken song)

Family and good friends. That's all you need in life. Thankfully, I'm very blessed.

Quote of Week ~ I've Maxed out my eliminations

2011-03-10T06:00:00.000-08:00

"Writing is 1 percent inspiration, and 99 percent elimination."

-Louise Brooks

No Quote of the Week ~ Cute Funny Instead

2011-03-04T06:00:00.000-08:00

I couldn't resist sharing. Basketball pics came back this week. We ordered the Memory Mate for each child. The Memory Mate has a single picture of a child, to the left their name, and below a team photo.

I opened the boys pics and realized there was an error. They used Twin A's name with a picture of Twin B and vice versa.

Without saying anything, I showed the boys. They looked at the pictures and said nothing. They didn't catch the error. I pointed out their names, "Oh look they have your names!" They still thought the pics were right.

Hope this brings a smile to your day as it did mine.

Writer's Corner Wednesday - Best Advice Ever

2011-03-02T06:00:00.000-08:00

Saturday, a local library held a "For the Love of Reading" event. Actually, a senior girl put the event together for her senior project. She did a fantastic job!

Four, local YA authors were on hand to read a few pages, answer questions, and sign books.

Kimberly Derting, author of The Body Finder and newest in the series, Desires of the Dead
Mandy Hubbard, author of Prada & Predjudice, You Wish, and more.
Holly Cupala, author of Tell Me A Secret and more on the way.
Lisa Schroeder, author of Chasing Brooklyn, It's Raining Cupcakes, and more.

The questions that Rachel (the senior girl) asked were very insightful and I think the whole audience walked away with new books to read, new authors added to their must follow list, and great tips for writing.

I could spend a lot of time writing up all I heard at this event...did I mention it was free? Who knew I would walk away with a life-changing attitude...okay maybe not life-altering, well, yea, actually is was, for me.

All four authors said their first drafts suck. I don't believe them, but I kind of want to, because it gives me a shove over my perfectionist hurdle. I grew up with the "Do it right or don't do it" relatives. My older sister does everything right. I am more likely to not do it. Honestly, I dust once a month because I know I have to do it right, I can't just zip through... and dog-gone-it, it's a pain in the rear doing it right. I kind of bring that to my writing. I feel if I can't get it right or close to right the first time, I must really stink. So it makes me feel better hearing other authors say their first drafts suck.

Now the best advice ever. You know when you're cruising along in your writing, you have all these ideas just pouring out and then SCREEEECHHHH! Your brakes lock you up because you can't decide what great event is going to happen. You start typing an idea, rethink it, try something else, and repeat for hours...or ever. Then the ideas get locked up and you are done for the day.

Well, Kimberly let us all in on Mandy's way of dealing with the above situation. While cruising along, instead of getting waylaid, she'll type, "Something cool happens here," and keep writing. Then when she's ready she'll figure out the cool thing and put it in.

A simple solution, but not something I ever thought to do. Big light bulb moment.

And, I have to say, it works. It's how I completed nine pages amidst chaos on Sunday.

Hope you find the tip as helpful as I did.

Another Grateful Post

2011-02-28T06:00:00.000-08:00

I understand it's not exciting to read someone else's grateful list. I do these posts for two reasons: 1) I like to remind myself that there are good things happening every day, and 2) I hope others look around and find whatever small thing they can be grateful about. Sometimes, those small gratefuls are what get us through a rough day.

1.) I'm grateful for the 9 pages I wrote in my book. It may not seem like much, but I did it amidst pure chaos: All the kids were home, husband was gone, and teen had friend over. Um, yep, it was chaotic and I still did it!

2) Both twins turning in all of their homework on time this week. We've had a four week spell where one or the other would get all homework in, but the spell has been broken.

3) Green lights all the way home... That is four from the store, yeehaw!

4) Teen son can handle himself in sticky situations...and he's lucky. Friday night, while out driving, some guys in a big SUV decided to tailgate and flash their highbeams. The SUV then turned off so teen went straight. The SUV came racing back up to him and repeated the process. Teen called 911, and while on the phone, came across two officers parked. He pulled up and pointed the SUV out. Teen did honk, at the SUV when it raced around him on a two-lane, no-passing road. Although, I can't imagine his horn would make anyone angry. Our truck does a nice deep, HONK! Teen's car does a small, wimpy, beee.....ee...ee..p. It is the most pathetic horn ever.

5) God is listening, and answering, all those prayers I send when teen son hits the road.

What are you grateful for today?

Mr. Math Whiz

2011-02-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

This is pretty much how I look at the end of the day, too.

Twin B scored in the top five of his class in Math. He's in fourth grade. His class is a mix of fourth and fifth graders.

Twin B had Math homework to finish today. He argued with me for 15 minutes. He insisted he would do it at school. I insisted he should do it now.

I looked at his homework, cringed, and told him to ask dad for help, should he need it. Twin B took his homework downstairs. Five minutes later he brought his completed homework back. I checked with my husband to make sure it was done correctly (Math is not my best subject). Twin B's homework was correct.

I have never finished anything pertaining to Math in five minutes. The child spent more time arguing than working. I felt badly when I sent him downstairs. Maybe I should have let him take it to school. Guilt, pecked at me for five minutes.

Next week, I will not feel guilty when I force Mr. Math Whiz to finish his Math homework. Humfph!

Yes, I am very proud of him.

Ever felt guilty only to learn later you shouldn't have?

Quote (okay, Paragraph) of the Week ~Show vs. Tell

2011-02-11T06:00:00.000-08:00

Since I'm working hard on showing versus telling, I thought I would share a paragraph I like.

"Rather than telling your readers that your hero's car is an old broken-down wreck, you can show him twisting two bare wires together to turn on the headlights or driving through a puddle and being sprayed from the holes in the floor. That way your readers can draw their own conclusions about the car's condition."
- From Renni Browne and Dave King's Self-Editing for Fiction Writers

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ Share Your Networking Tips

2011-02-09T06:00:00.000-08:00

Spring will be here soon.

No, I'm not talking about the social media sites. Well, maybe a little.

I've discovered I'm inept at networking. I can chat up a storm and make small talk easy enough. But the minute I'm to sell myself...crickets, lots of loud crickets.

I attended a Chamber of Commerce luncheon. The public was invited because they were kicking off a city-wide Get Fit program. I arrived early, sure that it would be packed to the rafters. Well, it wasn't. I was shocked, am I the only one who reads the local paper? Hello, there are nearly 20,000 people in this city. Twenty-two people were in attendance. Twenty-one of them were members of the Chamber of Commerce. Guess who the twenty-second person was? Yep, me.

One person, out of 20,000 people. I'm baffled. Anyhoo, back to the story. Everyone was prepared to network, everyone but I.

I received many business cards. Do I have business cards? Um, no. Did I offer my freelance services? No. Did I go up to an editor of a newspaper in the area? No. When the first person stood to speak, his suggestion was to go around the room and introduce ourselves along with the business we represent and our position with that business.

After many rounds of "I'm so-and-so, with such-and-such business, and I'm the important-job-title," we arrived at me. What came out of my mouth? "I'm Diane and I write...um freelance. And, uh, I mainly came because of the invitation to the public." Insert big smile, plastered on red face and a quick plunk back in my seat.

I'm not going to let this happen again. So, I'm trolling the internet and learning how to network. Anyone have ideas? Anyone have suggestions on links? Share, because the next time I cover this subject, I want to have a little pride and be able to relate a writing assignment acquired from decent networking skills.

How do you network? Do you offer up your freelance services? Do you put out there you an author looking for an agent (which I'm sure you should be putting out there, because a gal I know mentioned to an acquaintance she wrote a story and the the gal just happened to be friends with an editor at Random House)?

Grateful Five

2011-02-07T06:00:00.000-08:00

This is what I see when I look up from my computer.

I haven't done a grateful post in a while, so I'm pulling five things from my Grateful journal from this past week.

1. Twin B not having his math homework and wanting to get to school early so he can finish it before school. He's in fourth grade! No wonder his math score has increased so well.

2. Twin A starting in basketball. First year in basketball, too.

3. Surprising Teen Son. His Algebra teacher wanted to do breakfast for her 1st Period class since every student passed the semester. I volunteered to flip pancakes. The look on my son's face when he saw me in his classroom...PRICELESS!

4. Putting together a writer portfolio. Looking back through my published pieces it's easy to see how well I'm progressing in my writing. Nice!

5. A 15-minute nap. I can't recall the last time I took a nap, it was quite refreshing.

What are you grateful for this week?

Quote of the Week ~ On Writing for Children or YA

2011-02-04T13:03:00.000-08:00

"To increase the vulnerability necessary to make kids' fiction work, you often must disable the adults in the story, forcing the young protagonist to face things on his own."

- Jessica Page Morrell in Bullies, Bastards, & Bitches: How to Write the Bad Guys of Fiction

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ What's Your Method? + Head's up on a coffee contest

2011-02-02T11:24:00.000-08:00

See what's on my list today? I picked up a magnetic whiteboard so I could list out the main item(s) I want completed at the end of each day.

My to-do list is much longer and has items I hope to accomplish each day. However, I'm notorious for getting stuck on one thing and working on an easier project rather than pushing through the hard spot.

I'm loving this board. A simple solution that more focused people may laugh at, but it works for me.

What's your method for highlighting the main item you want to accomplish?

OH RIGHT! You want the scoop on the coffee contest. Well head over to Beth Mann's blog and enter away.

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ What's Your Style?

2011-01-26T06:00:00.000-08:00

That is my teen (center). You can't see in this picture, but every other shot his eyes are on one side of the stadium. There must have been a really cute girl over there. No, my pictures don't always match my posts, I'm kind of random like that.

I'm a planner. Or at least when it comes to writing I plan. When I finally got the nerve to share what I wrote, I set out to learn all I could. I researched everything I could get my hands on. When my library didn't have a book I wanted, I bought it.

I outlined...well, no, I listed out the steps I would take in my writing.

Publish tidbits. Check, I answered questions for AllYou Reality Checkers and had three published. I also answered a reader question in Shape magazine that was published.
Publish articles in regional parenting magazines. Check.
Write a column for a newspaper. Sort of Check. I was selected as the guest columnist for a local paper for the 2011 year. Not exactly what I was thinking when I first listed this item, but it works.
Write an article for a national parenting magazine.
Write articles for other national magazines.
Write a non-fiction book (which has changed to fiction, because I have these people in my head and they needed some place to go)

I haven't completed the last three steps, yet. But, I'm making progress, step-by-step.

I feel like I have unspoken rules I must follow. A road map if you will.

My friend falls into the Christie Brinkley (in Vacation with Chevy Chase) "Are you gonna go for it?" type.

She doesn't research (well, not obsessively like I did prior to writing), she doesn't worry about following a set path, she just goes for it. And you know what? It works...for her. She recently came up with an essay, wrote it, submitted it to a newspaper, and has since seen it published, in the span of a week. She's kind of awesome like that.

Are you a planner who wades in slow or are you a Go For It type who leaps right in?

She Always Said I'd Have a Child Like Myself...or Maybe it was a curse...

2011-01-24T06:00:00.000-08:00

I remember my mother yelling, "One day you will have a child just like you!" She yelled and muttered that line throughout my teen-hood. Since I was a typical teen, I rolled my eyes. Really? How bad could I be?

Skip ahead ~~many~~ a few years. I have called my mother numerous times begging her to lift the curse. Each time she smiles and laughs, and doesn't lift the curse. Really? How many times must I apologize for past wrongs?

Apologize for rolling my eyes and telling mom "You just don't understand." Check
Apologize for slamming door and swearing to never be a mother like her. Check (and yea, I'm like her- thank goodness)
Apologize for lying and going to party I wasn't supposed to attend. Check, check, check, (I'll have to check back and find out if I've covered them all).
Apologize for lack of time keeping and coming home from said parties waayyy passed curfew. CHECK...I even grovelled on that apology.
Apologize for "You're the meanest mom in the world," comment thrown out when I was grounded from above wrong-doings. Check and, just so you know, "She's the most awesome mom ever!"

If I've done all those apologies, what will it take for her to lift the curse? Oh, I get it. It's not a curse that can be removed, it's a curse that must be passed along type of deal. "Son, one day you are going to have a child just like yourself." Hee, hee, hee. The first apology, dear son, needs to cover the omission of concert ending time from Friday night. Three in the morning is not acceptable.

On the plus side, he's light years ahead of me at this age. He not only apologized, he hasn't argued the terms of his punishment. Nor has he called me the meanest mom ever.

Anyone dialing their parents, yet? And, for those whose parents are blessed with wings, know that your parent(s) need no apologies, they're happy watching over you and chuckling when your child relives moments from your youth.

Quote of the Week ~ So There!

2011-01-21T08:28:00.000-08:00

"In response to complaints that it took me five times longer to write the war than the participants took to fight it, I would point out that there were a good many more of them than there was of me."

-Author Shelby Foote, upon completion of theird and final volume of his epic narrative The Civil War. Found in The Little Book of Laughter

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ AHA!

2011-01-19T06:00:00.000-08:00

Determination trumps fear.

I tend to work an article idea to death. I mull it over, type it three or four times (yes, complete re-typing), and then revise it until well, the cows come home.

Once the piece is done, I consider submitting it. I bring it to my writer's group. Make suggested changes and think about submitting some more.

Toward the end of last year, I started submitting a bit more. Remember, I took the chance and tried for the guest columnist spot? First column came out a few weeks ago.

However, I have been sitting on six (1,2,3,4,5,6!!!) pieces that I really should submit. I've brought four of those pieces to my writer's group. They are ready to submit...I think. If I look at them long enough I can always find things to change.

Two weeks ago at writer's group, one of the gals pulled out an iPad. Now understand, I don't get excited about electronics. I can do without the one hundred and one speakers my husband drools over. I can do without a flat screen HDTV (although, I admit they are nice...I'm not chomping at the bit for one) and I can do without the 5 dot one gazillion surround sound which my husband claims adds fullness. I groan when a new way to record TV comes out, because it means the last three years I spent trying to figure out the current method of recording is now null and void and I have to start from scratch again. ARGH!

When I saw the iPad, it was eh, whatever. Then I touched it. Oh, the smooth, slick screen...I felt a bit of drool tickle the corner of my mouth. I have not been able to stop thinking about that iPad.

I made a plan. I am using my determination to acquire an iPad to further my submittal process. I've told my husband no matter how much I beg, he's not to buy me an iPad. I have to save the money I earn from published work to earn that sleek little toy.

It will take work. I submit to regional parenting mags because that has been my plan. Acquire clips before querying larger markets. Although, I discovered a flaw. I didn't specify how many clips I needed before targeting the larger markets.

I'm proud to say, I submitted to a medium-sized publication. I know targeting a bigger market will earn that iPad quicker. Determination to earn that iPad trumped my fear of hitting send. Okay, I admit that a shiver of horror rippled through my spine after I hit the send button, but I did it, I'm trying.

What's the determination that drives you past your fear?

Alrighty Then!

2011-01-14T06:00:00.000-08:00

"Good grief! Grow a spine and talk or stop calling."

- Me to an anonymous phone caller who kept calling

(for almost two weeks) during the hour I wake, feed, and shuffle kids

around to get them out the door for school.

I'm happy to report, two days with no calls.

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ "Uh, Thank You?"

2011-01-12T09:34:00.000-08:00

Picture this: You've worked hard on a column, you're proud and turn it in to your editor. It goes to print. The day the column comes out you bounce giddily up to grab the paper. Back in the house, you re-read your piece. The joy deflates quicker than a balloon as you realize, you never did switch that last paragraph around. Now, rather than summing up the piece neatly, the column reads like you ran out of room and just ended it.

When you step out of the house you see neighbors and a few friends. They all congratulate you on your column. They tell you it's wonderful.

What to do?

Option 1: You could tell them you messed up and forgot to switch up the last paragraph. After all, they might just be pulling the nice act and feel more confident in you if you realize your error.

Option 2: You could put on your best smile, say "Thank you," and chomp your lower lip to keep from blurting out your mistake.

Go with option two. It comes off more professional (just don't draw blood while discreetly chewing your lip).

Yes, these may be friends and neighbors, but the practice will help you when you meet a stranger who compliments you. And, you don't want that stranger walking away vowing to take another look at the glaring error or worse, thinking you're reaching for excuses.

All together now: Smile..."Thank you!" Nibble lip. Smile..."Thank you!" Nibble lip. Smile..."Thank you!" Nibble lip.

Solo

2011-01-07T09:44:00.000-08:00

"Flying solo today."

- My sister after winter break ended and school was back in session. Yep, many parents lost their wingman January 3rd. But no fear, our wingmen were back before we crashed and burned.

Thankful Again

2011-01-05T09:30:00.000-08:00

Ollie Bear

It's been a while since I've posted thankful thoughts. So, here I go, being all thankful again:

1.) I'm thankful I have a husband who understands my need for a desk of my own. He may have grimaced when I suggested the bedroom for my new desk, but he caved when he saw how excited I was...or maybe he caved because I was embarrassing him by bouncing up and down in the store.

2.) I'm thankful my kids are willing to try new things. The twins are playing basketball and are enjoying it very much. I get a chance to exercise without having to schedule it into my day and I get to converse with other people (this makes my husband happy since his ears get a rest).

3.)I'm thankful I risk sounding like a dork and blurt out "No, I don't work, I write." Mental head smack. But, those dorky moments pay off and I meet other writers whose work varies from what I'm doing. Which means, we get to learn from each other, cool!

4.) I'm thankful school is back from break. I love my children, they regale me with many funny tales, but I also like a bit of solitude. Okay, not having to break up battles over whose turn it is to read Garfield and threatening teen son to wake up before dark (lest people think he's a vampire) may play a small part in my dancing around because school is back in session.

5.) I'm thankful that teen son came home early New Year's Eve. Since the roads were a bit icy I wasn't sure how long it would take him to get home, so I told him to get home as soon as possible after midnight, but no later than one. Guess what? He walked in the door at 12:25.

What are you thankful for this week?

Kicking Off the New Year Right!

2011-01-03T06:00:00.000-08:00

A few things I've said good-bye to, some permanetly and others for a year.

[ Grrrrrr.....There should be a picture here. But Google and Blogger seem to be having issues. Anyone else getting the prompt to Sign In for Google Cloud Picker and then having your pictures rejected?]

See you next year my lopsided smiley snowman. This pic is great because it doesn't show the teeth marks my cats left on his scarf, which happens to be metal.

[And isn't this a lovely picture of my ceramic Frosty? Uh-huh.]

See you later Frosty.

Good-bye, hope we never meet again, wandering house writer. Yes, I have been a nomad in my home. Everytime I find a place to park and write, I have to pick up and move on. Main desk, gotta move because the kids need to do homework. Dining room table, gotta pick up because we're having dinner. Chair in living room, gotta move due to (pick one) company, paper airplane landing field use, Christmas tree take-over, and/or my all-time favorite I've been spotted by family and apparently, life can't continue unless we pick this moment to converse (because, you know it was right when I was on a roll).

[And here's my desk, ooohhh, ahhhh]

Yep, those days are over. My husband got me a desk for Christmas and helped me rearrange our bedroom so I have my own space. I don't need to move my laptop and notebooks, and pens, and dictionary, and agenda, and files every time I have to move. Ahhhhh.

[And here's my spiffy new lamp with tag still attached, nifty huh?]

Of course, I took pictures of my nifty little space, but can I add them? Noooooo. Blogger why?

Another way I kicked off my year right? I had an article published on New Year's Day. Woohoo!

Yippee! I cleared out my internet history and by golly, Blogger let me add my pictures.

Happy New Year!

2010-12-31T11:17:00.000-08:00

Mt. Rainier

"May all your troubles last as long as your New Year's Resolutions."

- From "The Little Book of Laughter"

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ Bucket Lists

2010-12-29T06:00:00.000-08:00

Amazing what you can find in the depths of grandma and grandpa's basement.

I keep hearing about Bucket Lists. I guess the name is quicker to say than the old "Things I Want to do Before I Die List." I thought about what I wanted on a Bucket List and then I started thinking about a Bucket List for my writing.

Here's what I came up with:

Sell an article three times
Have an editor contact me with an article on assignment
Find an agent for my book
Sell book to a publisher
Repeat the above

What's on your Writing Bucket List?

Brilliant Dip

2010-12-27T06:00:00.000-08:00

No, Santa is not the dip.

The kids received their Christmas wish. An XBox 360 (and one extra remote, they are responsible for buying their own games and extra equipment). Now, I understand how game companies nickel and dime us. It's the going trend.

My biggest pet peeve to this point was how Nintendo sold us on the Wii. All advertisements showed families having fun and moving around. Awesome right? So their brilliant marketing department must have received some fancy bonuses at year end for marketing toward families and only providing one controller. Yep, by golly, if you want to play with a typical family of four, you would have to shell out another $60 to $90 for extra controllers and nunchucks.

Apparently, Microsoft wasn't going to be outdone in this marketing scheme.

The kids received the 4GB XBox system that came with two games. One game was in the package and one game was a free download. The free download game is 6GB. WHAT?! I bet the brilliant dip that came up with that marketing is off vacationing in the Cayman island aboard a billion dollar yacht. Meanwhile, teen son continues to scour around for enough money to buy a memory card...or whatever the XBOX system uses.

My Absence Hasn't Been For Naught

2010-12-22T16:06:00.000-08:00

The road to the twins' elementary school.

Jeepers, I've been missing for over a month! I didn't intend to dissappear for so long. I got on a role with my writing and submitted numerous articles with some being picked up already and I submitted material for a chance as a guest columnist with a local paper AND I was selected. WooHoo!

I'm looking forward to 2011 and all the opportunities it will bring.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to check out your blogs. I'm sure I've missed out on great information, awesome updates, and some wonderfully hilarious stories.

Writer's Corner Wednesday ~ Writer's Books

2010-11-17T12:00:00.000-08:00

When I walk into Borders the first place I hit is the reference section with the writer's books. That is my favorite section. I have quite a selection of books at home, as well. So, I figure I will share the books I like and maybe someone will benefit. I'm also hoping that you will share your favorites with me, too.

Take Ten for Writers by Bonnie Neubauer is my latest obsession.

Ms. Neubauer understands time and money. I thank her.

Take Ten for Writers is full of exercises for writers. Yes, there are many books of exercises (I have quite a few), but these are short...well supposed to be around ten minutes. Of course, you can write longer if you're on a roll, but they are designed for short spurts. This is where Ms. Neubauer understands time.

There are days I sit down to write and I hear crickets. That's all. Usually, a fun little exercise will get my mind in gear and then away I go. Take Ten gives me those perfect little gems to start with. The book appeals to my immediate need to get my mind going and it appeals to my visual need of something entertaining and fun. All the exercises are designed with great art or photos.

Another great concept Ms. Neubauer has provided is re-usability. You don't read a passage and write on it only to come back a year later and have the same prompt. You read the first page which gives you some direction, then you pick a number between one and ten, flip the page, find your number, and that is your writing prompt. Each time you use the book (as long as you keep track of the numbers you've already used - and there is a line to write your number on) you have a different starting line. This concept saves me money. I don't get bored and run off to buy another book.

What is your favorite writing book?

All You Have To Do...

2010-11-08T06:00:00.000-08:00

Taken in the midst of "Mommmm, do you reall..(Click)...y have to take my picture?"

Last Friday, I had the opportunity to volunteer for JABizTown. It's a spiffy place for kids to learn what it takes to hold a job and run a business. It teaches them responsibility and financial management.

This didn't go well with the twins. Since it is their first year in separate classrooms, only Twin B would be attending (his class is a 4th/5th mix) BizTown. Not to worry, Twin A gets to do this next year.

My husband gives me a hard time whenever I come up with a project around the house. Apparently I always start with "All you've got to do is..." turns out it's never that simple.

That's the attitude I took to BizTown. All I have to do is oversee four kids (CEO, CFO, Sales Manager, and Service Tech) to make sure they are doing their jobs. I'm not to do anything for them, just refer them to their manuals and in the rare moment clarify expectations. By doing this, the Telephone Company will pay off their loan (the main goal). Simple right?

I attended the 2-hour volunteer training session. I saw the companies that the kids would be running (we couldn't volunteer in the same company as our own children - my son was a Safety Inspector with the Insurance company). I chose the Telephone company because it had the least amount of kids to oversee, this also meant I was the only volunteer in that business.

The manuals the kids used are very specific: 1. Take loan application and promissory note to bank. 2. Print invoices: Select x, click on y, enter z. SIMPLE!

I guess I got a little too arrogant. I thought it would be a breeze.

My little group arrived. Three boys, one girl. The girl was the service tech. She listened. She read her manual and followed the instructions, guess whose job was completed way ahead of schedule?

My CEO, CFO, and Sales Manager did not read their manuals.

CEO: Mrs. J, where is CFO going?

Mrs. J: To make a deposit, CEO what are you supposed to be doing?
CEO: Mrs. J I need to go check on CFO.

Mrs. J: No, stay here CEO...hang on Sales Manager, I will help you in a...CEO, where are you going? Come back. Buggers! He left.

CFO: Mrs. J. How do I do this deposit.

Mrs. J. The same way we've done it the past fourteen times CFO.

CFO: So I just take this?
Mrs. J.: and the deposit slip..HEY! CEO get back in here! You have to sign the employee paychecks.

CEO: It's my break now, Mrs. J.

Mrs. J: CEO, your employees aren't going to be happy if they can't shop on their breaks, you only have to sign four checks.

Turn to grab checks, turn back and CEO is gone. "BUGGERS!"

I will say the kids were all very polite and sweet...if not a bit disorganized.

Guess, whose company didn't pay off their loan? We were the only company that didn't pay it off.

If I ever say, "All I have to do...," or "It's so simple." Smack me.

Yes, I will go back next year. I will volunteer in a company that has more volunteers. We will pay off our loan.

Quote of the Week ~ Listen Children, Listen

2010-10-29T06:00:00.000-07:00

"Poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part."

- I have no idea whom to attribute this to, but he/she obviously had teens.

Pumpkins and Power Tools

2010-10-27T06:00:00.000-07:00

Yep, we discovered the easy way to carve pumpkins. I'm sure many people caught on to this years ago, but we just discovered it.

The kids started out wanting to design their own pumpkins and carve them step-by-painstaking-step. After an hour of gutting pumpkins and the kids still poking the holey outlines on their pumpkins, my husband fetched his jigsaw and drill.

My husband, who drools over platinum spark plugs and anything power laden, was all glassy-eyed and ecstatic. He taught the twins about power tools that night. I now have four fiendish power tool freaks on my hands.

Below are the creations (warning the pics are blurry, sorry):

Twin A's Pumpkin: It's a cross between a cat and something else.

Twin B's pumpkin: His version of the scream face

Dad's Pumpkin

Twin A's pumpkin - His version of Jason's hockey mask face

Twin B's pumpkin - It's his own creation.

If you look close you will see that 3 of the 5 pumpkins are semi-green and THICK. It was a bad year for pumpkins in Western Washington. The eastern side of the state had a great year.

Teen son was busy, but he's ready to carve with some friends. Thankfully, they are carving at someone else's house. I've cleaned up the dining room from the innards that flew the other night. Next year the fiendish four can carve in the garage.

Can you guess which power tool they liked the best?

Grateful Wednesday ~ So Much to be Grateful For

2010-10-20T10:36:00.000-07:00

I'm Grateful...well, I try to be grateful on a regular basis (although I don't recommend checking that with the guy who cut me off the other day).

FIVE REASONS I'M GRATEFUL THIS WEEK:

1. Fall in all its glory. The crisp, cold morning air is refreshing to walk in.

2. My kids' excitement at the pumpkin patch (we're going after school today). I love their faces trying to weed through the corn maze and the way they bound around trying to find the perfect pumpkins.

3. My teen son's enthusiasm for the fall season. Haunted Houses. Homecoming. Concerts.

4. Awesome teachers! My boys are lucky to have such great teachers. Even the high school teachers my older son has. He's getting a party in Algebra. I don't remember my math teacher throwing any parties when we all passed a test.

5. Critique Groups. I'm taking more chances and using less excuses now that I have extra eyes viewing my work.

What are you grateful for today?

It Has To Be Said....

2010-10-18T06:00:00.000-07:00

Dear Superstars, Divas, American Idol winners, and any other ego-driven person asked to perform the National Anthem:

Stop messing with the National Anthem!

I can understand when you take a Rolling Stones song and give it your own twist. That's fine. Heck, it's even expected.

However, the National Anthem is not your own. It belongs to a country that wants to stand together. But your ego is driving a wedge between us.

Every time one of you ego-driven souls steps up to the microphone and starts caterwauling your way through the anthem, the television pans the audience. And every time I can pick out a person, -sometimes they are elderly, sometimes it's obvious they are a veteran, whatever the case - trying to sing along and they can't. Why? Because you all want to be known for your version. Where can you hold the note longer than other's in the past? Where can you shorten, caterwaul, or alter a line in a way it hasn't been done before?

Why is this a problem? Simple. When I was growing up, I was taught to stand with my hand over my heart and sing along. It was unity. Now days the older generation has no idea where you will tweak the song and they get lost. The younger generation doesn't even bother singing because they've grown up with people altering the anthem at every event. Where's the unity?

A few years ago, my boys lined up for a pee-wee football game. The National Anthem began, a lady stood and sang. She sang the anthem the way it was written. When I glanced around the stands I saw people singing... following along. Everyone was together..oh we may have been off key, but we were united for that moment. I cried while watching an elderly vet sing along.

Sports venues, broadcasting stations, and ego-freaks, take note: Stop messing with the National Anthem! Get over yourselves and enjoy being part of a whole...if only for this one song.

Thank you,
Diane J.

Quote of the Week ~ By Golly Listen, Diane, Listen

2010-10-15T09:09:00.000-07:00

"Stick to the freaking first idea and make it work."

- Janet Evanovich in How I Write

Writer's Conference, Part 2

2010-10-08T16:38:00.000-07:00

Day two of the WOTS conference:

Outlining Class presented by Robyn Fritz

Robyn operates on the basic journalism questions:
Who - Who is it about? Characters, Audience, you?
What - What is it about? Plot. Storyline (characters/audience)
When - When does it take place? Plot. Time line (business)
Where - Where does it take place. Setting. Description. How it affects characters/audience
Why - Why does this story occur? Why are you telling it? Why does it matter in the story? Overall meaning. Theme (Personally, I need to ask myself these questions every page, so I love that Robyn brings this up.)
How - How you tell the story. Point of View. Voice. Narrative style.

Robyn used Janet Evanovich's One for the Money to go through the whole outline. I wish I had taken a picture of the chart and the story elements in the places she pointed out it was a tremendous help for the outline challenged, like myself. The who, what, why, etc... above was taken from the handout.

Ask the Therapist presented by James Rapson M.S., LMFT

This was a great class, but was much more beneficial to be there in person since you were able to throw out questions. Basically, go check out the DSM IV: Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders it will give you a good starting point.

Pitch Party (was to be presented by JoJo Jensen, but she was ill) presented by Leslie Atkins and Penn Wallace

I have to say, for stepping in to present a class at last minute, Penn and Leslie were awesome.

Penn has a penchant for stalking agents at conferences. Not really, but he gave us some great tips. If you don't want to sign up for one on one with an agent, here's his tips for getting an opportunity to pitch to them.

Go to the class/opening segment/ where ever it is the agents sit at a long table up front and tell people what they are interested in. Two reasons for this: 1. the blurb in the handout may not specify something that is interesting to the agent and he/she will mention that little piece that intrigues them and 2. you want to know what they are wearing. Memorize their faces and clothing.
If an agent says they hang out in the smoking area, you now know where to run into them. Go there. If they are surrounded by people, wait until it dies down, then ask if you can have a minute to pitch them. If they say no, respect their honesty and move on. Don't take it personally. If they say yes, be ready, give them a quick 30 second pitch.
If the agent is interested and asks you to send them an email with more, do it as soon as you get back to your room. Don't wait.
Practice your pitch until you can recite in your sleep. If you end up in the coffee line and an agent is in front of you, you want to be prepared. Apparently, nothing is worse than an agent turning around and asking you what you write and you respond, "Uh, well, it's this story, um about, uh..." Be as professional as you can. Apparently, agents respect someone who can be professional and get right to the point.

That's Penn way of stalking when he doesn't have an appointment. Although, those work as well.

Leslie pointed out that quite often the agents blurb in the conference handout isn't always up-to-date. It may say they like stories about dogs, but get to the conference and the agent says "I'm sick of dog stories." Be ready to mark off some agents you hoped to meet and add others who may say they want dog stories.

Okay, I'm getting wordy again. Hope you find some interesting tidbits that are helpful. I recommend a hotel. If you can afford it, it's nice to be able to run back to your room and type up ideas that have been gathering through out the day. I know the conference sparks the idea factory in my mind and being able to sit down and get it all out back in the room is very nice.

Have a great day!

Wednesday Writer's Corner ~ Writer's Conference

2010-10-06T06:00:00.000-07:00

That little speck is Natalie Goldberg, I know, kicking myself for not bringing my camera, the cell phone just doesn't work as well. I could actually see her better than my cell depicts.

First a thanks to my husband for taking on nurse duty. One of the twins caught a stomach flu in the wee hours of Friday morning. My husband got to tend a sick one...well, just until late Saturday afternoon when Twin A began to perk up and his stomach stopped hurting.

Alright let's do a quick run down. This year I took advantage of all the conference had to offer. I entered the contest...didn't win, but no worries, I was up against some stiff competition.

Friday, was the critique workshop. I entered 10 pages of my manuscript and received fantastic feedback. Not that my writing was fantastic, but great ways to improve and ideas gallore. Actually, I thought they would laugh at my work, but nope. I even got lots of encouragement that I was doing well...just things to tighten up, clear up, and make more informative.

Now I will give just a bit or two of ideas from each of the classes I took on Saturday and Sunday.

Saturday:
Writing Great Characters presented by Steve White
I have to say, it's hard condensing the advice I received in this class. Not only did Steve present massive ideas, he was entertaining as well. If he's ever in your neck of the woods I recommend going.
          ~ Say you have a story idea, but no main character. (This next part is copied from the handout) "So fix your story idea in your mind, and ask, "Who would be the most hurt by this?" Imagine a character who would be the most emotionally affected by the situation you want to write about."
     Steve's used Jaws for an example: Idea, what if a big creepy shark attacked a New England resort community? Who would be the most hurt by this? The sheriff, of course - someone charged with the responsibility of keeping the islanders safe. Someone who moved there from New York, specifically to escape violence and bloodshed. His children came too... and they love the beach. to top it off, he's afraid of water.
     For the islanders, the shark is scary, For Sheriff Brody, the shark is a nightmare. (Again, I stole from the handout for the previous two paragraphs).

     ~Now let's say you have a mean main character, a grumpy old coot or maybe a conceited high school teen. Why should anyone care about them? Well, according to Steve (who highly recommends Blake Snyder's Save the Cat), throw in a reason for readers to care. Do they literally save a cat from a hairy situation? Can they hand a homeless child some money or clothes? What can they do to show a softer side so the reader cares what happens?

Next class: Using Fact to Pump Up Your Fiction presented by William Dietrich
(I'm really condensing now to speed up keep this post from reaching novel lengths). Basically, do your research. Don't put someone in 18th century England sending a text message to their mother. Get the clothing right, get the streets right. Do your research. Hit up your local reference librarian and ask them to help you find the information.

Keynote Speaker: Natalie Goldberg author of Writing Down the Bones and many other books. There are so many wonderful ideas she shared, but you find them in her books. What you won't find in her books? What a funny, down-to-earth person she is. I love that she doesn't beat around the bush. During Q&A, and audience member took a while and never asked a question. Natalie wasn't mean, but got right to the heart of it, "So what's your question?" It's nice to know that when she first starting writing she had the same thoughts we have: "Why is anyone going to care what I have to say?" "I'm stupid trying to write this." Etc...

Next Class: I skipped. I had so many ideas brewing from the critique workshop, the first Saturday class, and the Keynote, that I zipped back to my hotel and wrote my heart out until catching the last class of the day which was:
Dialog presented by Paul Sinor
Another entertaining speaker. Let's see one piece of advice (hard to narrow it down), let's go with one that really needs to be taken to heart: Write for yourself and your character. If you are afraid of what your friend/ spouse/ children/ minister/ mother/ whoever will say when they read it, you have only two choices. Don't write or don't worry. (Again that was taken from the handout).

Since this post is getting too long, I'm going to forgo a quote on Friday and list a few bits from Sunday's classes.

What was the best thing you learned from a conference or a book?

I'm Late, I'm Late (posting) But I Have A Good Reason

2010-10-04T13:07:00.000-07:00

I didn't set up posts for Friday or today because I thought I would have time at the hotel while at the writer's conference. Yes, I am that naive. Are we all done laughing?

This picture does not do the view justice. Look beyond the garbage can, that is the beautiful Puget Sound. And this view was the small view. The front windows held a much larger view of the sound. It's difficult to look at the instructor when your eyes keep gazing over to the view. Thankfully, not all the classes I signed up for where in the Plaza Room (the one with the killer views).

Wednesday I will share a few tidbits that I learned over the weekend. And, let me tell you it will be drastically condensed, because I learned soooo much.

After enjoying and filling my brain beyond capacity, I came home to:

And this:

And many other freaky items, including an ugly, gray, fuzzy, red-eyed rat chasing me through the hall. All while my children laughed manically. Yep, Dad and boys spent the whole weekend putting up the Halloween decorations just to scare me when I got home.

What was your weekend like?

Just One Small Thing

2010-09-29T08:46:00.000-07:00

No big post today, I'm off to catch up on all your blogs. I miss reading them frequently. I know I've missed some good stuff. Have a great day!

Quote of the Week ~ Darkness Hurts

2010-09-24T10:36:00.000-07:00

"Don't play football in the dark."

- Said by Twin B while rubbing his nose.

Wednesday Grateful ~ The Fair

2010-09-22T11:25:00.000-07:00

Last night we did the Fair. With an empty wallet, you'd think I wouldn't have much to be thankful for, but it turns out I have a lot to be thankful about. No worries, I'll limit myself to five.

Family Time. Oh we do family time at home with movies or games or head out to bowl or Putt Putt some golf balls, but the fair lights up the boys' faces. I tell ya, they radiate a glow all night long. Look out Rudolph, they are looking for your job...they may have issues with the flying part, though.

2. Fun. Oh my gosh, the roller coaster is an oldie, but a goodie. It was the first year the twins were able to ride the coaster. They have officially reached freaky ride height requirements. We were all over the park. The boys got Dizzy Passes. The passes allow them to ride every ride, except the Extreme Scream (whew!). They didn't ride EVERY ride...they wanted to, but thankfully the Fair does close at a reasonable hour each evening.

3. Scones. Love the scones, they've been making them since 1911 and they can't cook them quick enough. We also can't forget the Cotton Candy. Even as an adult, I'm a sucker for that fluffed sugar. Turns out kids like it too.

4. Life. Yes, a bit dramatic. But you need to understand. The twins (9-years-old, average 9-year-old height, average 9-year-old weight), rode a new ride at the Fair without mom or dad. It is akin to the Octopus, but instead of the cars spinning out at the sides, the arms take them up and then the cars loop forward. They were the smallest ones on the ride. Thankfully, my repeated prayers for their safety (the whole ride through)worked. They came off unharmed and wore the "Oh-my-gosh-that-was-freaky-cool-we-did-it-first-big-ride-with-no-parents" look.

5. Simple rides still rock! The twins went through the Fun House a hundred times and later they found another one with some Rock-and-Roll vibe and went through a bazillion times.

One bummer: Our teen son did the Fair with friends, we missed sharing in his excitement. However, when he got home he filled us in on all he did, love that boy!

Either I'm a Sucker or...I'm a Sucker

2010-09-20T06:00:00.000-07:00

I bought a mosquito sucker machine. It emits a light mosquitoes are attracted to and sucks them in. They can't escape unless you open the flap. Funny then that the mosquitoes fly right by, buzz my head, bite my neck and then hover over the machine planning their next blood fest.

I bought a bug zapper. Yep, those great machines that fry the ugly bugs. We had one when I was little and it was awesome. Since I was little, the machines have apparently undergone some safety tests. They now have so much metal wrapped around the zappy light that no annoying bugs can get in.

I bought a wrinkle cream that, according to the advertisements, ranked better than $300 creams in how well it worked. I still have fine wrinkles forming on my forehead, but now they are surrounded by zits.

It's official, I'm everything the commercial people love in a consumer...a big old sucker.

Quote (mini-conversation) of the Week - Only in High School

2010-09-17T06:00:00.000-07:00

I can't help it, the high school is providing me with some doozies, so I have to share.

"Hi Mrs. J! Dylan and I are getting along now, but we don't talk."

"You get along, but you don't talk?"

"Right, we're friends that don't talk."

"Oh..kay."

And the girl from last week's quote told my son she wanted to be friends again, too. I wonder if she chose a talking or non-talking friendship.

Wednesday in The Writer's (aka Worry Wart's) Corner

2010-09-15T06:00:00.000-07:00

I emailed an instructor a question prior to submitting my 10 pages for the critique workshop...he never replied. I twisted my hair, nibbled a fingernail and decided he must be busy.

I chomped on my fingernails, but stopped when I bit skin, then hit send on my 10-pages for the critique workshop. I still haven't received word from the instructor. I twisted some gray hair until it broke off.

I have a hang-nail begging me to yank it, but I know that would hurt. So instead of letting my nerves get the best of me again, I decided to ask all of you a question.

Scenerio: You pay extra money for a critique workshop at a conference. You know the conference is legitimate...you've attended the previous two years. This is the first year you've signed up for the critique workshop. When you don't hear back from the instructor on your question (just a tiny question) you brush it off as he's busy. You submit your material and wait. Per the conference directions you should receive an email from the instructor with the other workshop attendee's material a few weeks before the conference.
Friday, will be a few weeks.

Yes, I know I have a few more days before I should really stress, but what do you think the next step would be? I thought about emailing the instructor again with a "Just checking to make sure my email went through...you acknowledgement avoiding fiend." But thought that might not fair well when the workshop started. I thought about calling the conference people and asking where they find their fruit cakes, but again, figured that may not fair well for me. Okay, seriously now, when do I worry and who should my contact be first: The instructor or the conference people? And, of course, I would be polite...and wait until Monday. But I fear I may chew my fingers off if I don't have a response by Tuesday.

Life is Good

2010-09-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

I'm happy. No major reason why, but here are a few little reasons:

Football is back - yippeee!

I've submitted all the pieces I've been working on for the conference

I've submitted another article

I've started another article

My boys are happy in their classrooms (first year they've been in separate classes)

Teen son is making choices: Ride the Extreme Scream at the fair or purchase gas for car (he chose gas)

My dad is coming to visit today - he's never met the twins

The weather is starting to get that autumn smell

What's making you happy?

Quote of the Week ~ Overheard at the High School

2010-09-10T06:00:00.000-07:00

"I'm only sitting next to you because I know you. I still hate you."

- High school girl to my teen son

Grateful Still

2010-08-25T09:52:00.000-07:00

I'm grateful again. So, that's the theme we are going with.

1.) I'm grateful that handsome young man in the above photo, came home in one piece...in that car...after his first drive with no parents in the vehicle.

2.) I'm grateful that I received no less than 4 - count 'em 1,2,3, and 4 - hugs from the same young man. That's a record. He knew how unnerved I was and each time he took the car, he gave me a hug. Yes, it was his way of preventing my "NO! Stay home and never drive again," freak out.

3.) I'm grateful that my blog friends haven't ditched me. I actually, have over a hundred followers (doing the happy dance again).

4.) I'm grateful that I'm falling into a nice schedule, and can finally get back to visiting blogs and commenting again. Sometimes, I create a bit too much chaos for myself and then have a hard time wrangling myself back on track, I'm sorry. I do miss reading your blogs. I love the way you make me laugh, make me think, make me get off my duff and get busy.

5.) I'm grateful for the fresh morning air. It's like inhaling positiveness.

What are you grateful for today? If you have little ones, or not so little ones, grab them for a hug the next time they cruise by.

Monday, Monday So Good to Me

2010-08-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

Soon I will be looking forward to Mondays, everyone else in my house will dread them.

I have a countdown chart going on in my mind...yeah, you know me too well, it's also on the calendar.

Tomorrow teen son gets his driver's license. His actual, no parent needed in car, driver's license. Tomorrow I will be in the midst of an anxiety attack.
This Wednesday I mail my contest entry for the writer's conference I will be attending in October.
Throughout the next 10 days I will be revising 10 pages of my WIP (work in progress - my book) for the critique workshop at above mentioned conference.
September 3rd, I email those 10 pages to the instructor. This may be the day my heart just gives up and stops beating from the anxiety overload.
However, there is a jolt to restart my heart. September 7th, school starts...hang on.........okay I'm back. I had to go do my happy dance. My husband equates my happy dancing to those two girls in the Charlie Brown Christmas Special. They are wearing purple dresses. You can see them here in this clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBPcoI4OE9Y . Just 11 more days, I do love my children and when they grow up I am going to have a horrible case of Empty Nest Syndrome, but for now, I get a few hours of peace. My teen just asked, "Why did you just do an evil laugh?" If only he knew, hee, hee, hee.
Finally, October 1st - 3rd: I go to the writer's conference. I will enjoy it, because next year I will won't be attending this one, I will be attending one of the larger ones and pitching my book. I do love this conference I have learned a lot. Every year I have pushed myself to do more at this conference. This year I will finally max out by taking advantage of every program they have to offer.

What are you pushing yourself to do? Are you stretching your fingers and reaching toward a goal you want? What big events do you have coming up?

Part Two of Guess that Character ~ the Reveal

2010-08-20T10:14:00.000-07:00

~ Vanessa Warner ~

First, I want to thank Jen over at Unedited for hosting such a great blogfest.

I know I ruined the reveal by posting the pictures above. I found the pics, but lost the websites I found them at, so when I came to write I couldn't move the pics without another all out search.

Vanessa just looks like Audrina Partridge. I don't know what color Audrina's eyes are, but Vanessa's are deep brown. I don't know what Audrina is like, but some of her pics were a little a risque, something Vanessa is not.

Vicki came the closest to guessing Vanessa. She is popular, but definitely not Homecoming Queen material (I loved that description Vicki). She's not snobbish or mean to other people, but she does take note of their attire. She loves fashion and isn't a complete product snob, but she does have some a penchant for name brands, although accessories are usually inexpensive and picked for their sole ability to complement her outfit. She would easily pair a Wal-mart t-shirt with her Seven for Mankind jeans.

Mary made a great statement and called out my Vanessa character as cliche. Thank you! I don't want her to be cliche, but I see areas that I need to tweak to show that she's not an elite witch. Sometimes, it takes a good smack upside my head to help me notice some things. Thanks again, Mary.

Vanessa, really can be self-centered especially at times when she feels the whole world is against her, but deep down she knows better. She has a secret that even her friends don't know about that shows what a compassionate person she can be.

Vanessa is smart (but it doesn't always come through in her grades) and driven.

Thanks for all the comments! It really helps when writing my character to know what others see. And opens my eyes to areas I need to show how Vanessa isn't your typical cheerleader.

Now, I'm off to see if I got close with anyone's characters.

Guess That Character Blogfest

2010-08-19T09:19:00.000-07:00

Jennifer over at Unedited is hosting a blogfest: Check it out here.

It's a two day affair so I won't be doing a Friday quote, but you will get a visual of my main character.

Here's the rules, stolen directly from Jen's blog:

Day one (yes, that would be today) everyone will share a piece of their story and your job is to guess what you think their main character looks like!!!

Day two (yes, that would be tomorrow) everyone will do the big reveal and that's where the reactions take place!

I'm late enough getting this up so without further ado, here's Vanessa.

I went to my window and sat on the ledge. Nat is a Sophomore. Since her Freshman year when she made the cheer squad, she has been following me like a stray dog following the scent of bacon. She copies my hairstyles, she copies my clothes, she copies everything I do. For her to send that text, it's obvious I'm now a complete outcast.

I crawled back into bed and wrapped myself in the down comforter. I wondered if they would treat Blake like this if the situation were reversed, if he lived and I had died. I wondered why I was considered such a vile person for an accident. It was an accident, it's not like I intentionally sat in wait just to run him over. What the hell? For being such a likeable guy, I was not liking him much anymore. He was ruining my life and I had hardly known him.

There it is. Enjoy and here is the link to all the other participants:
Blogfest Link

Grateful Wednesday ~ Can always use a positive outlook

2010-08-18T06:00:00.000-07:00

Oh yeah, I'm also thankful that there are only 20 more days until school starts.

It's been a bit since I've done a grateful post and we can always use a bright outlook.

Five things I'm grateful for:

1.) Children's laughter. My twin boys have become addicted to Wipeout (the TV show). We gather together for this guilty pleasure and laugh and all the contestants. Last night, the boys were enjoying the show, but the best laugh came from a commercial. I wish I had paid attention to the company that ran it, but I had turned down the volume. It was about some people standing on a mountain and one guy slips down the mountain. The twins were laughing so hard they were crying. Yes, we are suckers for slapstick.

2.) Fresh fruit. We enjoy all the summer fruits, we've been gorging ourselves on pluots, cherries, grapes, cantaloupe, watermelon, pineapple, nectarines, berries of kinds.

3.) Dictionaries. I am a complete sucker for dictionaries, I love words. I also love the smell of my mondo desktop edition. It's from the 60's and it just has the wonderful old resource book smell.

4.) Writing exercises. Lately, I've been cranking out a lot of writings. Most aren't going anywhere, they're just fodder for my notebooks, but I've been impressed with some of the ideas I've gotten from all that writing.

5.) HGTV. I know I pick on how spoiled some people appear, but I love the creative ideas. I get all fluttery when a family picks a complete fixer upper. I love seeing the outcome.

What are you thankful for today?

~ It's A Heat Wave ~

2010-08-16T09:19:00.000-07:00

Summers in the Pacific Northwest are actually quite mild. You wouldn't know that by my past summer posts. Once the temp hits in the 80s I whine worse than a three year-old who's been denied ice cream.

Last year we had a major heat wave. We reached temps of a 105 for a few days with a couple weeks in the high 90s. It was a serious heat wave....or springtime for those in the South.

I am a wimp, I don't deny it. If I lived in a hotter location, I would be worthless. Don't get me wrong, I'm only wimp in summer. When we are blessed with brisk cold weather, I'm alert and active. I prefer freezing temps. I love going out in the brisk cold air, my nose and cheeks turning red. I love playing in the snow and the cold making me so numb my joints stiffen, then coming inside with my snow boots' rubber soles squeaking on the floor, drinking a cup of hot cocoa steaming life back into my face, the tingle of my legs and fingers warming up, and capping the cold day off by climbing into bed at night wrapping myself into a cocoon of blankets.

However, living in the Pacific Northwest, or more specifically Western Washington, we don't get many brisk cold, snowy winters. We do gets lots of rain and temps that bounce around in the 50s and 40s. These mild seasons are what keep everything a lush carpet of green, including the moss.

Going back to that heat wave from last summer. When the reports started rolling in about the impending doom, er heat wave. I told my husband we had to get AC or we were going to die, keeled over, gasping for air while our sweat dripped around our necks cutting off the last, spindly flow of oxygen. Being the man he is, he rolled his eyes and mumbled something about dramatics.

When I saw how fast AC units were flying off the shelves, I upped the ante. I told my husband if he didn't get an AC unit, I would leave him. When no tears filled his eyes and I noticed a wistful smile at his mouth corners, I threw in that I would take the kids, too. He caved. I had failed to mention that had I left, I would have just gone to his parents' and hung out in the basement until the heat ended.

That AC unit only cools the living room, but we survived last summer.

This year, we have had a couple of days that reached into the low 80s, but it's mostly been in the high 60s and low 70s. The evenings drop down in the 50s. Great temps, if you ask me.

However, all good things come to an end. We have had mid-90 degree temps going on three days now. We will be dropping into the high 80s later this week.

I didn't whine the first day, but yesterday I was a grump who sat like a lump, whining.

My husband, in a loving gesture...or in hopes of having fresh laundry and a decent dinner, pulled out the little window AC unit. Peace was restored and my husband was rewarded with a healthy dinner. The laundry will have to wait, it's not near the AC.

Quote of the Week ~ Inconspicuously Walking Away Whistling

2010-08-13T06:00:00.000-07:00

"Families are like fudge - mostly sweet with a few nuts."

- Unknown

Operation DOL Stakeout - Success

2010-08-11T12:06:00.000-07:00

I have to say that following people is a lot harder than I thought. Hang back, watch. Uh, no. Hang back, pass vehicle as it pulls over, round corner to loop back and where the heck did the car go?

However, I did notice that the poles they put up were closer than I thought they would be. Teen son practiced parallel parking the truck between two tree branches and a barrel. He did well.

The drive test was this morning. I noticed between yesterday morning and this morning, no one else seems to do drive tests in anything larger than a mid-size car. Personally, I think my son should get points for being brave enough to try in the truck. Of course, it's not like he had a choice.

All in all, he did well. He passed with an 84. He had few things that he knew and that he had told me prior to the test and those are the things he missed. Go figure. I blame the genes we passed along. I hate tests, the first question and I'm crying "What is it, what is it? I should know this, crap I forgot to study my name!" He gets the same anxiety.

I am proud of teen son. He worked hard, he even bypassed hanging out with friends last night just to work on parallel parking and backing around corners. Amazing what a teen boy will give up to get his license.

However, he isn't licensed just yet. In the state of Washington you have to pass the written test first, then book your drive test (3 and 1/2 weeks was the earliest available slot), and then you still have to wait until your 6th month before you get the license. August 24th he will have had his permit for 6 months. We will be at the DOL first thing in the morning for him to get his license. Knowing teen boy, he will probably want to camp out.

The DOL wouldn't give out anti-anxiety meds to parents when kids get their permits. But I'm sure they are just saving the meds for when our kids get the true license, right? They can't expect parents to survive that stress without help, right?

Operation: DOL Stakeout

2010-08-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Time: Tuesday 7:00 a.m.

Plan A: Wake up, wear grayish colored clothing...scratch that, I have nothing gray. Wear blah colors.

Arrive at the DOL (Department of Licensing) rear parking lot at 8:15 a.m.
Back truck in parking spot, preferably near dumpster so as not to be conspicuous...scratch that dumpsters are green, truck is blue, midnight blue. Find shady spot.

Locate a subject to tail: Preferably one with a fairly good sized rig. Locate the DOL employee who wears a look of disgust...scratch that, they all have the same look. Locate the DOL employee who is checking out cars.

Discreetly note:

1. Whether or not there are poles added to the parallel parking space for drive test. Does the DOL employee shake head if driver adjusts vehicle more than once?
2. Tail subject out of lot and note the area the drive is tested in, specifically, where the 'back around corner' portion of the test takes place.

Do the above without drawing attention to self or, more importantly, to truck.

Plan B: Bail out on mission and pray son doesn't have to park truck between bars on parallel test.

I know, what kind of parent stakes out the DOL and some poor teen taking a drive test? One who desperately needs to know if she has to locate a car for teen son. The truck will pass the vehicle inspection. The car, well, it's debatable. There is that one little issue with the one seat belt that doesn't work. We have taken the vehicle in for a replacement belt, but apparently, everyone else decided they needed one too and the part is on back order. So teen son will have to test in the truck on Wednesday morning.

Since dear son has to take the test in the truck he is quite nervous. We have been practicing in the rear lot at the DOL. They have an indent in the curb for parallel parking. Envision a curb along a city street which indents just enough for one car to park in. At the front of the curb is an orange drum, at the rear of the curb, nothing. My son, can get the truck in the spot and do quite well. However, a lady at the DOL said they take in the "equipment" each night. This concerns us. If there is a drum or pole or whatever placed in the back portion of the curb, the truck will not fit. Right now it fits only because the bed has the room to hover over the back of the curb. Without that, it's a no-go.

Plan A must be accomplished. I need to know if I have to locate a car within 24 hours that meets the high standards of the DOL and that my son can drive.

It's not really stalking if you don't know the person, right?

My Wednesday post will be in the early afternoon since teen son's test is in the morning...unless tailing a DOL employee and some poor unsuspecting teen is illegal, then I may not be able to post until I convince my family to bail me out.

Quote of the Week ~ +1 for ADD

2010-08-06T06:00:00.000-07:00

"I sometimes worry about my short attention span, but not for very long."

- Strange de Jim. In Herb Caen, column San Francisco Chronicle, 10 February 1974

Writer's Corner Wednesday - Conference

2010-08-04T06:00:00.000-07:00

I am quite lucky. There is a writer's conference not far from me and it is reasonably priced. It has a reasonable price because they do not have pitching sessions. However, they do have some nice workshops, a contest, and critique workshops. I also get excited because it's my "me time." I could drive up each day, but, really, who wants to get up at 5am? So I get a room and enjoy the two days of bliss (I get full control of the remote, a bath with no kids pounding on the door, and a clean room that I didn't have to clean - luxury).

The last two years I've gone I only attended the workshops. Last year I did attempt to mingle at the Saturday reception. I even found a gal to go to lunch with. I'm an odd duck. I tip my toe in social waters, yet when it comes to real water, I dive right in. Go figure.

The Write on the Sound Conference is coming up again. This year I'm stiffening my spine. I signed up for one of the critique groups. There are only 10 slots so as soon as my registration brochure came in the mail on Friday, I called to get a spot. And, I got one. I am so excited, but oh so nervous now. My check is up waiting in the mailbox to be taken away. I also paid to enter the writing contest. Once that mail truck drives away I'm going to be a ball of nerves with a fire under my rear.

Do you have any conference plans this year? Are you pushing your comfort zone to keep on a forward path? What is the best mingling tip you can share?

Weekend Fun

2010-08-02T16:27:00.000-07:00

If you've followed this blog for a while, you understand that I've done some inane things in my life, like this and this. You would think I would learn, but apparently, that is not the case.

As I type this, I'm lying on our couch in a V-shape position...well, a wide V. See, I forget that as we get older there are some things we just don't do so well anymore. I'm not that old...39 isn't over the hill. I certainly hope not anyway. Yes, I have been exercising. That must have been why I felt strong. Who knows what was rolling through my brain...oh, wait I do know what I was thinking: A) I didn't want to walk 60 to 70 yards to go get my son and have him try to back our truck down a windy drive. B) I didn't want the kind older gentleman to help me carry a coffee table 60 to 70 yards. So, I got a wild hair and figured I could do it. After all, I did carry the twins in their car seats which gave me some very nice arms. But darn it all, if you don't use those muscles after so many years, they disappear. What's with that?

Anyway, I lugged my garage sale coffee table to the truck. It was worth it. I've been trying to find a coffee table like my mother had. The kind that opens up and you can hide all the crap lying about. $7. Well worth my back telling me how stupid I was lugging a freakin' 30-lb. coffee table to my truck. My back will heal, but I am certain that table would have been gone if I had turned my back.

That was on Friday. My back let me know all day Saturday how un-brilliant I can be. Sunday, my back felt better. I took full advantage and did what I do best...embarrass myself. Pain and humiliation, I should be making money like the Three Stooges.

I went shopping with teen son. He was my bag carrier and chauffeur for the day. First stop Target. We recently added a little car to our household. I have to admit, it is nice to be able to fit anywhere. It was a great buy, it's a '91 Nissan Sentra XE. Our great buy has sucked more money than we intended, but we are happy to not have car payments. My son parked in one of the front parking spots, you know the ones you never get lucky to find. We thought about buying lottery tickets.

We bopped...okay he meandered and I waddled, into the store, got the items on our list and headed out. As we neared the car, I spy a large gouge in the paint (it's a used car, but the condition of the car is quite nice). Located on the lower left side past the wheel well. I was friggin' ticked. I ranted about people not being able to drive and leaving without even a note of their error. People walked by, shaking their heads glad it hadn't been their vehicle. Now, in all honesty, had the offender paged us in the store or even left a note, I would have let it drop. I mean we only put liability on the car. We use it for a back up and for teen son to have something to putter around in (i.e. get to school and back... and everywhere within a 100 mile radius). No, we are not nice parents who buy our kids spiffy new vehicles, nothing builds character like figuring out how to push a car out of traffic, jiggle a choke mid-way up a hill (these were all things I remember most about driving...I feel my son should have such wonderful experiences, too).

Right, I'm off track. I just couldn't let it go that someone had driven away. So I waltzed...okay gimped, back into Target and asked the security gal if they had video cameras. Sure enough they did. But, we have to file a police report and only the police can view the videos. Fine, whatever. Called the police out. Very nice men. Got some spiel about not being able to take a report on private property unless someone was injured or it involved drunken driving, etc.... But, they said I was being nice so they'd go see if they could get the plate of the vehicle that did this. Honest moment here: I was nice because I had left my proof of insurance card on the counter at home. A little bit later the two policemen come out with these big grins on their faces. Just so you know, that's never a good thing.

They asked where we had been prior to Target. "Well, nowhere, we just left from home." The grins get bigger. As the video shows, clear as day, we putter into the lot and low and behold the mark is on the car already.

Where the mark came from I don't know. Only I would report a false hit and run on a car that is not worth fretting over. What made it worse was the ladies who were listening to the officers tell me the mark was already there. One gal volunteers at the same school the twins go to. *Cringe* I'm not looking forward to school staring now.

Today, just seemed like a great day to nurse my aching back and my wounded pride.

Quote of the Week ~ Trust

2010-07-30T06:00:00.000-07:00

"You know more than you think you do."

- Benjamin Spock

Vacation All I Ever Wanted...

2010-07-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

I forgot to post Monday. I am taking a week and a half off from blogging. Vacation time! What exotic locale am I heading to? Well, um, none. As a matter of fact we aren't even leaving home. No it is not a Staycation, just because that term annoys me to no end.

Nope, it's the best vacation. No packing, no begging for people to watch the cats, no ticked off felines destroying the home because they've been locked up, no airplanes (flying scares me and even more now that I can't pack my own alcohol), and no long car trips with children yelling, "He's breathing in my air space!"

I'm chilling out at home with the kids and my husband. We are working on teen son studying for his driver's license, playing in the pool with the kids (um, no it's not an olympic-sized pool - it's an inflatable one), playing board games, going out for breakfast dates (that's just for my husband and me), and wandering where ever our hearts desire. So far, it's going well. I shall return July 28th.

Now, get off the computer, grab a loved one and go get some sun...or if you're in Western Washington hang on until the late afternoon and then get some sun.

Quote of the Week ~ No Lightning Necessary

2010-07-16T06:00:00.000-07:00

"My advice is not to wait to be struck by an idea. If you're a writer, you sit down and damn well decide to have an idea. That's the way to get an idea."

- Andy Rooney

Wednesday visit to the Writer's Corner: I'm a Putz

2010-07-14T06:00:00.000-07:00

I am attempting my first novel. That's going well...I think. I keep adding to it and forging ahead. It's hard because I want to look back and correct a few things, but I need to finish first.

Now that being said I still write articles for regional parenting magazines. Some day I will get the nerve to submit an actual query to a national, but until that courageous moment strikes, I will keep building a nice clip file from the regionals.

I submit to regionals by writing the piece first (I know it goes against everything we've learned, but it works best...for me anyway). However, I hit stumbling a block.

I took a writing course (it was fantastic) where the instructor had us write a piece, revise it until it shined, and then told us to redo it, but interview people to give the piece more pizzazz. The whole purpose was to show us how to make a great article even better. I admit the article was much better. Apparently, this works well for me. I still like to write an article first and then do an interview.

Well, it used to work well. I had an article I put a lot of time into (yes, I know I should never get that attached, but I did). I loved the article. I worked on it, polishing it till it shone. Then I did the interview. *Pardon me while I pound my head against the wall some more* Okay, I'm back. I have spent months trying to work my interview quotes into the piece. Each time it seems choppy, stilted, boring. I have come to hate the piece. I have put the article away for a week to give myself some distance. I hoped fresh eyes would show me my error, but I'm blind. Maybe I asked the wrong questions in the interview?

I now stare at this elephant and wonder what to do with it. Do I bag it? That seems so harsh since I interviewed a lovely gal for the piece. Is the frustration to make it just right the reason I'm messing the piece up? My gut wants to burn it, but holy flippin' tamoles! I interviewed a gal for the piece.

I ask, what do you do when you loved a piece at first, but later came to despise it? Did you continue with it? Did you try to redo the piece in a different way than you originally viewed it? How do you know when to let it go?

Zombies and Flame Throwers

2010-07-12T06:00:00.000-07:00

This was when teen son (the one who just turned 16) was 13. A local teen girl was making a film and he was thrilled to be a Zombie. He's the handsome Zombie right behind the girl applying blood to another guy.

Another Fourth of July has passed. The Fourth is an eventful time, but doubly so because it just so happens to be the birthday of my teen son. He's 16 now.

This year we celebrated a bit differently than in the past. We usually host the family at our house, do dinner and fireworks and send everyone on their way. This year, we brought dinner and cake to my in-laws (aka: the cool grandparents). We ate, son opened presents and we left. Sounds mean to eat and run, but my poor in-laws have endured long hours of fireworks for many years and driven home late. Meeting them at their house and saving them from the fireworks marathon was actually a kind gesture. We be-bopped over to hubby's boss' house for the fireworks...*ahem* illegal fireworks. Nothing like coming home covered in shrapnel.

Since teen son didn't want to hang out by himself on his birthday, he brought along a friend. We had to take two vehicles to accommodate all of us. Hubby chose his work vehicle. You know why? So I couldn't offer to drive home solo while he rode with the rowdy boys. Nope, I had to drive the rowdy boys to and from the shindig.

Anyhoo, back to the driving. Teen son's friend has a fear of a Zombie Apocalypse occurring. Yes, you heard me right. My son and over-sugared twin boys taunted the poor boy. He texted ChaCha and was quite excited when they responded with "Yes, a Zombie Apocalypse is possible." Apparently, scientists have five theories on how it could happen: 1. A brain parasite and 2. Neurotoxins. We don't know what 3, 4, and 5 were because the kids all became wired and were talking over each other. They were all concerned now.

I wasn't concerned. Why? Because I don't think there are enough brains for Zombies to survive. No Zombie would attack a teen boy, all mothers know they don't think before doing anything. Therefore, if a teen doesn't think, his brain can't emit an "eat me" signal. Mothers would be under attack, but we are a fierce breed. We have enough to do with children tugging at every last thread of sanity, a Zombie trying to grab a thread, too would sorely regret it (ladies, you know what I'm talking about: we hold up well until someone yanks that last thread and then we snap leaving a trail of horrified people in our wake - or maybe that's just me, I sure hope not). Zombies may be afraid of moms due to "The Look." Dads, on the other hand, are screwed. Sorry guys, it's just the way it goes. It's the price you pay for your brains kicking in later in life.

Back to the conversation in the truck. My boys who were previously razzing the poor friend, were no longer laughing. Twin B piped up from the back: "Mama, are flame throwers real?"
Me: "Um, yeah."
Twin B: "Can we get one?"
Me: "Uh, son, people just don't hand out flame throwers."
Twin B: "No mama, we can buy one from the store."
Me: "Walmart doesn't carry flame throwers."
Twin B: "No, Home Depot."
Me: "Oh right, aisle five was fresh out of them son."

*Sigh* Just another typical conversation with my brood. I have to say, I was pleasantly happy that teen friend started this whole episode. It gave me hope that other parents experience such fun conversational topics.

Quote of the Week - I can't tell you how many writers I meet these days

2010-07-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Yes, this is my cat. Yes, he is drinking beer. No, I don't willing let him drink, he gets a tad aggressive when he sees/smells/ hears a beer being opened. Yes, he has a beer gut. No, AA will not let cats attend meetings.

"Writing is a socially acceptable form of schizophrenia."

~ E. L. Doctorow

Must be 21... and Dead to Attend

2010-07-02T10:32:00.000-07:00

NOTE: Ticketmaster caught their error and it's listed as a tribute. It was previously listed as a concert performance by Johnny Cash.

My teen son just pointed this out and I had to share. He was surfing through Ticketmaster's sight in search of bands in our area. And guess, what? Johnny Cash is having a concert. It's at a casino so you have to be 21 to attend. Here's the link:
http://www.ticketmaster.com/event/0F0044E111B97715?brand=&tm_link=tm_homeA_h2

Hope the error brings a laugh to your day. We sure did have a good one.

Quote of the Week - That's a "damn" good tip

2010-07-02T06:00:00.000-07:00

"Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very;" your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."

~Mark Twain

Head's up: Erica over at Chapter by Chapter is having an awesome contest. So swing over and check it out.

Grateful - For Summer Break

2010-06-30T10:34:00.000-07:00

Alrighty! I'm back to being grateful. Usually, I count the days until school starts. Love my kids, but man that food bill. Where does the food go in those boys? If I ate what they did, I'd have to roll downstairs...no telling how I'd ever get back up the stairs.

Today, I'm thinking of all the reasons I'm happy there isn't school.

1) There is no homework. Yeah, I know it's the kids homework, I shouldn't worry about it. However, I'm thankful for no homework battles. You know the routine: "Did you do your homework." Child (huffing) "Yesss, Mooomm." "Well, let's see it." Child: "Mom, really, do you always have to look?" "Yes." Child: "Fine, I'll go do it." Every. Single. Time. When I'm 97 years old and can't remember my name, I will still remember this conversation. It will just be etched in my brain.

One other thing about the homework. When the teen doesn't have math homework, I don't feel so inferior. I admit it, I sucked at Algebra. I always understood Accounting, always got A's, even on my Accounting Principles II Final in college. Throw letters in my numbers and I'm lost. Let's not get started on ratios. My husband and my first fight was over ratios...no wait, it was second fight (our first Christmas tree was our first fight). He knows math. He did very well in math. It was not a good fight.

2) Moving along, I'm grateful that wake up calls for teen boy are over. He is not a morning person. I am a morning person...as long as no one talks to me. Okay, I'm not that bad. Teen son is a Grump-a-saurus. He is never fully awake until he's been up for at least two hours. Which means in summer, he's a grump until 1 or 2pm. But that's okay, I've had my required coffee intake and can maintain a calm when he stumbles downstairs from his beauty rest.

3) No late starts. Why the school has to have late starts I don't know. I think they like messing with parent's schedules. Supposedly, it's a time for teacher's to get work done. Reality is, they sleep in. Whenever I've called for a teacher on a late start day they were not in. No, I take that back, there was ONE teacher who was there...I nearly fell off my chair in shock. If you arrive at the school early you will see that the teacher lot is nearly vacant.

4) No forgotten lunches, money, uniforms, band instruments, coats, children ailing, homework phone calls. I do not race to the school with every forgotten item. My children have learned the consequences of forgetting items, like homework, at home. It's the only way they will ever learn, right? However, there are those moments, where I have forgotten to send lunch money or bagged lunches. I have also forgotten to pick up my son's band uniform at the cleaners on a day he is leaving school early to attend a parade. When I drop the ball I feel responsible to race out and fix it. The calls from the school when a child is not well are understandable. The calls from the school over mundane crap, well, I have issues.

When the fifteen-year old boy was in 4th grade, he never wanted to wear a coat. He rarely does now, at most it's a sweatshirt. Anyhoo, I would remind him, he would purposely leave it. I know our kids need us to teach them how to be safe, prepared for life, yada, yada, yada. At the age of 10, I believe our kids are smart enough to know whether they are hot or cold. My son was, and is, capable of deciding what he needs to wear for the day's weather. The school called me one day. "Mrs. J, this is the third day this week your son has been to school with no coat. Could you please bring him one?" The school did not like my response, I'm sure they even wrote my response in my son's file for future reference of why I'm a horrible parent. My response "He doesn't need his coat. This is the third day the temps have been in the high 40's, low 50's. His longest recess is 20 minutes. He never stops running (seriously, he ran around the whole time) the minute his feet step out the door. He is in no danger of hypothermia."

5) No PTA/PTO/Booster club/Band Parent Association member cornering me for more money, more help, more crafts, more snack deliveries (come on people, they're teens - they don't need snacks anymore!), more fundraiser tickets, or just to tell me the latest gossip. Honestly, I don't know who Diva Deceitful is, and I don't care who she's flirting with.

Let's hear it, what are you happy not dealing with since school is out (teachers, I know you're chomping at the bit to say "Parents like you." I do understand, some of us parents are nuts. I offer to buy a case of Exedrin every year for each of my kids teachers.)

Dogs and Swimming

2010-06-28T11:20:00.000-07:00

Saturday, the twins and I enjoyed a fun day at our local park. Hmm, I'm realizing I don't talk too much about my husband or the older kids. They are alive. They just make other plans (grumble, grumble, it sucks when your kids' friends drive and take them away). As for my husband, yes, I really do have one. Weekends find him working in the yard, building on the kids' playhouse, laying down tracks on a new song he's excited about, and puttering around the house. This weekend he nursed a bum foot.

Back to the twins and I. We have a few parks within walking distance of our home. The first one is just a small little play area not quite a block from us. The second park is one mile away. That park is the largest and home to all things the city likes to promote. For instance, every two weeks in the summer the city hosts an outdoor movie night at AY park (that's the name we'll use for this post). AY Park is also where the city has BL Days (we're using BL to represent the city name). AY Park has three or four ball fields, a skate park, play area, snack shack, basketball courts, and is located directly across the street from the big lake in town. We're talking, 70 yards between the play area and the water's edge/ boat launch.

(I want this pooch. He's a Shiloh Shepherd)

Saturday was "Bark in the Park". It was all things dogs, I'm guessing 'Bark' gave that away. We don't have a fully fenced yard and dear hubby is not a fan of dogs so we get our dog fix wherever we can. The kids loved petting all the dogs we saw and watching a few competitions. After we got our fill of pooches, we headed into the woods (AY Park has a approximately 20 acres of forest and trails). The boys had a blast. We've been on the trails before, but the trails never disappoint. This trip we even found a small hideout someone built. My inner child was giddy.

After walking the trails of the forest, we went over to the water. Shocker! It wasn't busy. There were a few families and lots of boats loading and unloading, but the swim area was relatively empty. Whoohoo! We raced home and changed into swim gear and zipped back. I have no pictures of the boys swimming. I forgot the camera in my haste to get back to the water.

We have never gone swimming at this park, one mile from our house. Why? Because AY Park is the sleaziest park in the summer. I discovered this when the fifteen-year-old was 11. He went with some friends to the park to go swimming. I went to pick him up and nearly cried. Chalk one up for "horrible mom moment." Yes, he went swimming without me. I wasn't too concerned because I knew the local police patrolled the whole area often. Yeah, dimwit moment. I never asked why the police patrolled so often. *SMACK*!

As I wandered through the throngs of people attempting to locate my son, I saw: Hoards of women in bikini's that made pasties (or whatever and however you spell those things) look like grandma wear, guys with no shirts and their pants unbuttoned so far that it would be indecent exposure if they even guffawed once, a condom on the sidewalk, three separate fights, and numerous couples who desperately needed a room. I heard: Swearing that would make Andrew Dice Clay blush, rap music, rock music, country music, and (no kidding) polka music all within 30 yards - combined, it was atrocious.

I located my son and bolted. When my kids want to go swim in the lake we drive six miles and go to the North side where we pay a $7 entry fee. There's a reason you pay, they keep the riff raff out.

You can see why I was so excited to let the kids swim at AY Park this one time. Apparently, it isn't hot enough yet (we have yet to reach temps over 77 ~ I'm okay with that) or the riff raff doesn't awaken before 3pm.

We were there for the G-rated family time and left shortly after I realized the PG-13 hour was heading into the R-rated hour. We had to be out before the X-rated crowd arrived.

Quote of the Week - I've got the nails, someone pass me a hammer.

2010-06-25T06:00:00.000-07:00

"If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door."

~ Milton Berle

Switch-a-roo Time ~ A visit to the writer's corner

2010-06-23T06:00:00.000-07:00

I'm still a grateful person, but Grateful Wednesdays are going to have to share time with The Writer's Corner. Maybe that should be changed to the Writer's Quandary. Here goes:

I struggle with prepositional phrases. That struggle shows because my works then become passive voice nightmares.

I know, maybe if I went to college and studied for an MFA this wouldn't be an issue. Yes, I'm a substandard writer who loves to write. Should I quit? Heck no! I also happen to be hard-headed and stubborn (you can send sympathy cards to my husband). Nope, I will not quit. Eventually, I will learn the rules and lock up the passive voice witch and prepositional phrase monster.

You might wonder, "Gee, Diane, if you know what the problem is why do you keep doing it?" Well, I have an answer for that...I don't know. Every time I think I've conquered the issues I get feedback saying, "watch the passive voice." And, every time I read that feedback, I go back and re-read the piece. And, every time, I think "I don't see it." So, I pull out all my writing books (I don't have an MFA, but I did attend college and I swear I got A's in all the English courses I took) and flip to the worn pages to re-read about my trouble spots. Then I correct the trouble spots and get feedback I like to hear. Every. Damn. Time.

Does anyone else have an issue they keep encountering? What do you do about it? Did you used to have an issue, but came up with a great way to resolve it?

End of the School year

2010-06-21T06:00:00.000-07:00

I love the end of the school year. Well, okay, I don't love that my boys will eat us out of house and home. Our heating bill goes down and our food bill triples.

What I really love about the end of the school year is the writing papers my children bring home. I get such a kick out of the stories they concoct. Okay, so this only pertains to the younger ones because the only stories I hear (heaven forbid teens use written communication - aside from "CUL8TR" and my all time favorite "k") from the teen come from "Excuses 101."

Since third grade seems to be the peak of intriguing stories, I'm going to share a story from each of the twins today.

Twin B: The Bad Field Trip

Clang, tick, crash, they were staking (stacking) the chairs and the closet doors were shutting. Suddenly the teacher yelled "Quiet!" Every body was quiet for the moment. First they were getting in their groups. Second every body was lined up. After that they headed to the buses.

Every body was on the bus and they were halfway at the fire department. 30 min. later.

They were their (there). Fire fighters were talking about the hoses and ladders and rooms. When they were sharing about the fire trucks TwinB was looking around in the truck room. Next the fire fighters told everybody that they get a chance to go in the back of the truck. TwinB was last in line. When it was TwinB's turn he got in the truck his self.Then he told them that he will come down in a second. Suddenly the door shut as TwinB turned around. After he looked at the shut door he tryed (tried) to get out. The next day their was a BIG fire. The fire fighters found out that TwinB was in the back. First they asked "What's your address?" "I don't know." TwinB said. Next the fire fighter asked him "what's your phone number?" TwinB knew his phone number. Then he told them his phone number. Then they dialed the number quickly. Then TwinB's mom gave the address to the fire fighter. They went to his house, dropped him off and quickly drove away. TwinB entered his house and said "I'm scared if I can go in a fire truck." TwinB said. "Why?" said TwinB's mom. "Because I got traped (trapped) in one." he said. "Then try not to be last in line." TwinB's mom said. I would just like to add that yes, this is a comment I would make. However, if my child didn't come home for a day I would have been a bit more freaked out.

TwinA: My 80th Pool

My first pool erupted like a volcano. My second pool had a gurnd (no idea on that word). My third pool blew up like a water tower. My forth (fourth) pool got scratched up. My fith (fifth) pool got dessolved. My sixth pool was heavy it broke through the ground and my other pool fell in the hole my 78th. Seriously, does he really think I would keep buying pools?

I hope the stories bring a smile to your day, they did mine.

Rambling and Curious

2010-06-14T10:35:00.000-07:00

I'm late getting my Monday post up. It's because I have finally sold my book! You're not buying it, are you? Well, someday, that will be my excuse and it will be legitimate. That's what I keep telling myself, anyway. I like to live behind rose colored glasses. Thankfully, my family grounds me. They knock my glasses off, replace them with some brown tinted lenses and, on rare occasions, reign me in when I start floating away with a random idea. I haven't sold the book (not even close to trying). I just had a wild hair and wanted to try the excuse out.

Blogger opened up their new design center. I'm sure you've all noticed it. Some of you may have noticed that I've been playing with all the designs. I can't help it, give me a few weeks and I'll settle down. I'm like a kid with a new toy. I do not have the ability to design my own blog (yes, I know there are sites that make it easy, but honestly, I lack the patience) so when a new toy opens up that does all the work, I'm a sucker. Someday, I will learn how to create a button or whatever they call those doohickey's that are synonymous with one's blog. I even know what I want, a background that is full of chaos and in the foreground a gal who is smiling contentedly. But, therein lies the problem. The smile could be construed as insanity; I ride a fine line between content and insane. Some days I can be found teetering awful close to the insane category. Oops, getting off track. Where was I going? Oh right, the little kid in me having fun with the design templates.

I'm curious. What is your favorite toy? What sucks you in for hours and reminds of your younger self?

*I will tame my randomness and hold it back from future posts, but today I was feeling spunky.

Quote of the Week - I Must Learn

2010-06-11T06:00:00.000-07:00

"The best writers make the fewest words go the longest way."

-Anonymous

Grateful ~ Making It Short AND I Need Input...EEP!

2010-06-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Alright, I'm going to make it quick for today because after my grateful snippets, I'm asking for input (gulp!). Oh, I'm only doing three gratefuls...not because I don't have many things to be grateful for because I do, but again, I'm trying to be quick.

1) I'm grateful for Twin A trying something new. He ran in his first Fun Run this past weekend - YEA! He did quite well, too.

2) I'm grateful for one beautiful sunny day this last weekend. It's been rainy, drizzly, and gray for quite some time. The sunny day also happened to be the Fun Run day.

3) I'm grateful that I'm taking a huge chance today. I'm sharing a snippet of a section of the novel I'm working on at the end of this grateful post.

~~~

I'm sharing this piece for one reason. I need input. I want your first impressions. I want your honesty...you can be as brutal as you want just hold off on the "keep your day job" comments because I don't have a day job. Well, I write articles and so far I've had three articles published and three small blurbs published. Basically, it could be considered a day job, if I were raking in the dough, but I'm not. So, yeah, no day job to fall back on. But, you can recommend books, websites, blogs, etc... that may be helpful.

Deep breath....and deep breath...and here (breath in) we (suck in more) go (huge exhale):

The ride seems like forever. I keep seeing the white tarp, the ambulances, the fire trucks, and the police cars lights swirling, the officer’s voice “fatality,” followed by the woman screaming “Blake.” It’s like a mad carnival Ferris Wheel, the images of the cars and people whirling, the words and screams becoming the ride’s “music”.

“Vanessa!” I hear my mother calling me, pulling me back from the eerie carnival playing in my head.

Why is this happening? When will this gut-turning feeling end? I want to go home, I want to be on the phone with Jessica making plans for our next cheer competition. I want to be picking out strappy sandals from Nordstrom’s for the picnic next week. I want to be anywhere, but here.

Alright, there it is. Any input is welcome. Too wordy? Am I botching the English language? Whatever it is that doesn't set right nail me on it. It's the only way I can learn and get better.

It's Got to be a Guy Thing

2010-06-07T06:00:00.000-07:00

I love my truck. Okay, it's not just my truck, it's my husband's too. But he usually drives his work vehicle which is a Scion Xb. I don't think he loves his work vehicle...maybe because it's associated with work.

We aim to keep our vehicles in good working order. This past week was no exception. I had to break the news to hubby that the truck needed some loving care. There was the front-end alignment that we kept putting off after getting new tires (I don't think it was heinously necessary, but I do like to protect our investment - the tires aren't cheap), there was the rough idling that had just started, there was the check engine light that I ignored because I had a bout of vapor lock last August (I just associated it with the high temps I was travelling in, coupled with a two lane highway that I don't like to mess around with when passing so I floor it and the air conditioner at full power). Anyway, I couldn't get gas in the truck. Love the station attendant: "Are you sure your tank isn't full?" Being the sarcastic person I am I replied with: "I bet you're right. It's totally possible that I just drove my truck 300 miles and used a half pint of gas to get here").

Where was I? Right TLC for the truck. Anyway, she started shaking and shimmying when coming to a stop. I knew the brake pads were fine and we just had new front rotors put on her a year ago. But, there was definitely something with the brakes that needed to be checked. Nothing worse than doing the hokey-pokey down the highway: You put your left tires, you pull left tires back, you put your left tires in and you shake it all about, you do the hokey-pokey and piss off the other drivers, that's what it's all about. Sadly most drivers don't get the hokey-pokey. They do, however, know the bird.

My poor husband was trying to be positive and hoping that it wouldn't cost much. He hates transferring money from savings. That and he was hoping to do some more work on his '84 Trans Am (it's the only thing he has left from bachelorhood).

Once the service guy called and gave him the news I thought he would be crushed. I called him later that day to find out what the damage was. My husband gave me the total first (Ka-ching, Ka-ching, Ka-ching). Then he told me what they were doing: Front-end alignment (check, knew that). Some hoses that caused my bout of vapor lock (okay, good). The hokey-pokey was caused by heat-warped rotors (we have lots of hills, can't go anywhere without going downhill - and we're not talking about mini mounds, we're talking steep grades, so this is understandable) so they resurfaced all the rotors. And the tune-up for the rough idling (check, she's just shy of a 100,000 miles).

My husband was taking this better than I expected. Then I found out why. He listed all the things that were getting taken care of in the tune-up. He took a deep breath near the end of the list and I swear I heard some drooling, "she's getting platinum spark plugs." He said. Right! Guys have this thing for metals. I will never understand it. I'm just glad they weren't titanium or he may have broke out in song.

I Knew It

2010-06-04T06:00:00.000-07:00

Just another reason why I should never drive over this bridge again (the picture doesn't do it justice - It's 250 feet above nothing, okay that may be a bit dramatic: the Carbon River is 250' below the bridge deck). Did I mention that there are corners on either side of the bridge? Did I mention that only one vehicle can pass over at a time? Now Kinky tells me that one day I may be right.

"If you're paranoid long enough, sooner or later you're gonna be right."

- Kinky Friedman

Grateful Wednesdays ~ Children

2010-06-02T06:00:00.000-07:00

Five things I'm grateful for this week all of which pertain to my children:

1) I'm thankful that the boys will walk to the library with me. It's only a couple of miles, but it's nice to have company. It's always fun to explain to passersby that "No, my kids aren't afraid of you. They are playing spies and apparently (hee, hee) you're the villain they need to hide from (insert awkward giggle)." Surprisingly, no one giggles back.

2) I'm thankful that the 15-year-old puts me in awkward positions: For example, when his music teacher asked me if my dear son had been practicing (surprisingly because he was doing better). I got to reply with "Um, yes." This wouldn't seem like a big deal because my son was practicing. He was practicing the guitar and the bass guitar and the drums and the keyboard. He was not practicing his trumpet, the instrument he plays in the school band. Why am I grateful for these weird moments? Because solving puzzles is supposed to help keep Alzheimer's at bay.

3) I'm thankful that my kids have enhanced my detective skills. I can determine whether a suspicious sticky spot on the floor is honey, juice, or jam just by the way my foot peels off the floor. I know who did it just by the length of silence between the suspects. And, I can locate a missing item in under 22 seconds. Again, Alzheimer's prevention...although, I haven't read about what these scenarios do to my mental stability later in life.

4) I'm thankful that my kids lead me on expeditions: Like the favorite "Where in the World is Teen Child?" He's not at the front of the school where I usually pick him up, could he be at the store across the street or am I going to circle back to check the band room door? Or...maybe he's staying after to finish an assignment? I could call or text, but apparently his phone has issues and responding would be giving me a clue. But, I usually prevail and locate him. I wonder if I can earn points for that? (This is not to be confused with my detective skills because those are reserved for when I'm hunting for an offender or item near my home, these expeditions take me on trips around towns and offer sight-seeing).

5) I'm thankful that my kids are actually quite good. Despite the typical teen and young boy shenanigans, they all have a great sense of humor and good hearts.